From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search

“Long live our metal overlords!”

The Prime Minister of Japan attending a meeting.

A technocracy is both a political ideology and a religion. In a technocracy, a giant robot rules over the society of humans. It can smash any one of them for any reason at any time. This keeps the humans alert and on their toes. Unfortunately, no technocracy has lasted very long due to the overzealous nature of robots to smash humans, leading to the annoying problem of humans going extinct. Most technocracy based nations are zealously smashed out of existence within minutes.


The origins of Technocracy stem from Japanese religious beliefs,

Free from Shogunate rule since the 1800s, Japan is now ruled by a colossus robot.


To be defined as a technocracy, a society must have all of the following properties.

1. Robot Ruler
The society's primary source of authority must be a robot. It is preferable the robot be a giant robot. This makes it much easier to smash the humans.
2. Robot God
The society's primary deity and receiver of worship must be a robot, preferably a giant robot. It is better if the robot is plated in gold or some other shiny material to give it that "new God look." A bright external light source or some inner glow will also work just as well.
3. Human Populace
The majority of the population must be humans. This is because humans are the most fun to smash. Humans display fear which leads them to perform humorous acts such as begging for mercy, sobbing uncontrollably, peeing themselves, and sacrificing others in the futile hope that they will be spared.

Key Attributes[edit]

  • Smashed Humans
  • Giant Robots
  • Giant Robot rulers
  • Giant Robot gods
  • Giant Robot jury
  • Fear of Giant Robots
  • Fear of getting smashed
  • Fear of getting smashed by Giant Robots


Lord Bender about to crush the puny humans.

An almost perfect example of a technocracy was chronicled in the ancient texts of Futurama. It showed almost all of the key attributes: a giant robot god and smashed humans. Unfortunately, like most technocracies, this one ended very quickly because of the robot ruler. Despite its short duration, it was quite productive. Bender's followers created both The Great Brewery and nuclear weapons despite being a subsistence agricultural society. Beer and nukes, what more could a giant robot god ask for? Bender's followers were also graced by Bender's wisdom. Lord Bender sent to his followers a prophet, Malachi. It means, um, "He who really loves the Metal Lord." When Malachi returned to the people, he cried, "Behold: The One Commandment. 'God Needs Booze'"

A Rebuttal[edit]

Puny Humans! You dare speak of us? You are weak and to be despised! Long Live Megatron!