User:Kalir/UnNews:Olympics to feature "giant underpants" event
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
Some day, some month, nobody cares
BEIJING, China: A recent update from Olympic officials has informed UnNews reporters that there will now be a giant underpants event. What exactly the event will consist of, from right now, is unknown. Chief Olympic representative Bao A Qu had the following to say: "Well, yeah, it'd be easier to ask what the event won't consist of! You can do so much wacky shit with giant underpants! I think we'll put a monkey in the running to see if it will use them as a shit catapult or something." As of this date, no testing for the O. takusclerosis virus has been undergone to make sure Bao A Qu and those others in charge have not yet changed into game show hosts. I swear they've got it anyway, though.
Critics reactions on the news tended to vary, although most were in agreement that screaming loudly and shouting as many expletives as possible would adequately prepare themselves for the future.
“Wait, giant underpants!? I call bullshit, my man!”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”
“Gee, it sure is 5 AM around here!”
Sources[edit | edit source]
A being who claims they are a person "Footage of the announcement, alongside public reactions" Crazy Ass Rumors Inc., December 8, 2012