User:Jokerman/Rick Snyder

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You better not take his lunch money.

Richard Dale "Rick" Snyder (born August 19, 1958)[1] (R-MI) is the "governor" of that mitten state otherwise known as Michigan. His platform is that of creating jobs in the jobless mass that is Michigan. He cites his experience by having created thousands of jobs himself.[2] He was born in the Michigan town of Battle Creek, where corn flakes came from. He also was one of the few Michigan citizens to be able to climb Mackinac Bridge by using his teeth. He also "fired" the damn Canadian Jennifer Granholm and beat Democratic opponent Virg Bernero, mayor of Lansing and some worthless independent retards with a majority of more than 58%.

Early Life[edit | edit source]

As a tough nerd, as one would expect, Snyder did his fair watching of Star Trek in Battle Creek while ironing his Superman underpants.

Snyder was born here.
  1. We're not sure. He hasn't shown a birth certificate.
  2. Provided the jobs were created in Asia. But hey, they're still jobs, right?