User:In Soviet Russia, username choose you

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In Soviet Russia, Unencyclopedia registers on you!
Hello, western capitalist to website from In Soviet Russia, username choose you
I have greatly enjoyed your welcome and look forward to leaving contributions.
I have also enjoyed ignoring your
 
 
I do not guarantee to sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig.png) above the edit box or even log-in, automatically producing my name and any old date. --In Soviet Russia, username choose you 20:18, 35 Novembust 1649 (GMT)
If I need help, I might ask in the Forums, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with an insulting message and hope someone will not come along and help if they can. Additionally, the Uncyclopedia Adopt-a-Noob program is there to turn experienced editors straight to you.
If I have any burning questions I will ask for firelighters or join IRC channel at; irc://irc.freenode.net/uncyclopedia
In Soviet Russia, IRC channel will talk me at:
  • server: irc.freenode.net
  • port: 6667
  • channel: #uncyclopedia
And finally If none of the above I can use the :irc.wikia.com/uncyclopedia web based CGI client
In Soviet Russia, I will be hope create many funny articles not for westerners. You can decide which article comes first by voting here.
 
::Which of these articles should be written before it is invented first by the Chinese?
Please vote below. Results will be shown when you have voted.
You are not entitled to view results of this poll before you have voted.
There were 0 votes since the poll was created on 16:28, 15 January 2013.
poll-id 56907BFB6DE2AE1BF90E694BF4C3B537

 
<poll>
Subject line
Choice 1
Choice 2
Choice3 etc.
</poll>
Many less to come unless ideas are first stolen. In Soviet Russia, username choose you 21:58, 12 November 2007 (UTC)
 

Please note I only discovered unencyclopedia in November 2007 and will therefore be in the running for Noob-of-the-month on Dec 1st 2007. If I do not win this award I will re-register with a different username every month until I do get one.

 

My Memory[edit | edit source]

Is technically working however I frequently find I cannot remember how to format articles to make them look clean & tidy. To help me with this I have decided to save any good bits that I find in blue boxes like this 

<pre>

</pre>

My Articles[edit | edit source]

 

I hereby certify that the following pages were originally created by me and I have backup copies to prove it 

<font face="script, roman" size="+2">Some text</font>

Some of my contributions[edit | edit source]

Tesco[edit | edit source]

New Marketing strategy.

Sainsbury are even circumventing the "Recruiting at the school gates" laws by allowing their head of marketing (Celebrity chef and pukking idiot) Jamie Oliver to go into schools and cook School dinners while pushing the Sainsbury ethos that you have to visit Sainsbury's if you want good wholesome, not-for-chav, expensive, flavour-packed food instead of the reformed turkey products available at Tesco.

However Autumn 2007 saw the rivalry intensified when Tesco signed up the Spice Girls to head their new marketing strategy, pushing to the forefront of the British publics mind the ethos that if they can recycle five old bags so can you and reconstituted, reformed old turkey is cheap you know.

See also, The Tesco Slogan vote.

Muppets[edit | edit source]

History.

It is a matter of oppinion that all muppets originated by originally starting their origination in the original United States of Australia. Original supporters of this theory claim that this must be the original case since Australians spend much of their time around bars being loud-mouthed with their non-original complaints about Fuzzy Bea-yahr.

Please note: it is highly unlikely that this theory is original according to two old gits sitting in a box at the back of the theatre. Readers should be advised that this is nothing to worry about as we have paid Bruce Forsyth to set fire to them. No muppets will be harmed during this procedure (except the two on fire at the back obviously).

 

Politics[edit | edit source]

 

Politics exists in many countries however the most exciting varieties exist only in the United States, where it is sometimes referred to as 'snuff' politics due to the amount of Bush and Gore it contains.

 

This just in... and out[edit | edit source]

These are edits which I am proud of despite their removal by a bunch of hairy, gormless editors with broken funny bones who wouldn't know a joke if the Chinese invented one for them. They are included here because I liked them enough to save them.

 
 

Other astronomers working at the world renowned Jodrell Bank observatory beleive there may actually be signs of life emanating from 'Earth 2.0'. Dr H. J. Christ PhD, MSc, BSc, IQ230, BrnBiG had this to say

"We are all very excited about the signals currently coming from Earth 2. We are monitoring regular transmissions in the 18,250-18,290MHz waveband which occur every 60-75 seconds. At the moment we are struggling to decrypt the transmissions but it looks like some sort of extra-terrestrial language. So far we have decrypted the words 'Maÿ Din Ch٩ Na' which is very encouraging" ~ Dr H. J. Christ


 

Images[edit | edit source]

The following images plastered on various pages throughout Unencyclopedia were provided by me

 
Miniature.png 
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[[image:Miniature.png|thumb|left]]
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TrumpetWeevil.jpg 
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[[image:TrumpetWeevil.jpg|thumb|left]]
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Other Stuff[edit | edit source]

h o w  t o  m a k e  r a n d o m  c o l o u r e d  t e x t  

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MoneySignBadge.png I Found Money Award
This poor bastard ended up at Money$ign's user page from
hidden links from various articles. Feel sorry for them. I do.
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