User:Hyperbole/anyhoo

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Anyhoo is the thirty-fourth episode of the critically-acclaimed epic miniseries, Weebl and Bob.

Plot Summary[edit | edit source]

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Warning: The following text might contain spoilers.

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The scene opens with a monkey, who informs us that he is down in a well. Suddenly, his location changes, and he notes that he is in a tree. He then introduces himself as a monkey, and asserts that he cannot be stopped.

Weebl, a wobbling egg, appears, and argues that, in fact, he can stop the monkey, by making use of a cannon. The monkey takes up the contrary position, contending that Weebl has not maintained his cannon well, and that it has been filled with meat food products rather than ammunition. The cannon collapses, confirming the monkey's summation of the situation and conferring victory in the debate on him, at which point Weebl utters an expression of frustration.

The monkey then proceeds to relate to his audience some of his back story. Apparently, he has escaped from some sort of menagerie, and has defecated copiously. He ponders the question of why he never seems to be able to reach a toilet when he feels the urge to move his bowels. Bob, a miniature version of Weebl, concurs that this is an interesting question. Bob observes that the piles of feces left in the monkey's wake are likely deleterious to both his, and the monkey's, collective health.

The monkey then reaches a final conclusion: it is impossible for anyone to catch him. Weebl re-appears and inquires about what would happen if he were to surround the monkey with foxes. The monkey ignores the question, instead taunting Weebl by claiming that Weebl doesn't, in fact, have any foxes, rendering the point moot. Weebl angrily instructs the monkey to be silent, and insists that he has ten foxes, and that they are residing in a nearby pile of boxes.

Bob protests and accuses Weebl of equivocation, reminding him that the true contents of the aforementioned boxes is the Ark of the Covenant. Weebl, chagrined by the mention of the Ark, complains that it is inappropriate to discuss that subject; however, Bob rebuts this complaint with the observation that such discussion is more ethical than fabricating information about foxes. The monkey also expresses shock that Weebl would be untruthful on the subject of fox possession. A mollified Weebl apologizes, offering by way of explanation that he only wanted to find a way to detain the monkey.

Suddenly, Bob experiences an epiphany: he could catch the monkey simply by surrounding him with toilets. Surprisingly, upon hearing this conclusion, the monkey readily agrees, and applauds Bob for reaching it. Bob inquires about the nature of the prize he has won for solving such a difficult problem. The monkey responds that, should Bob put his plan into action and actually trap him, he would be remunerated with a coupon for a very small discount on sprouts.

Bob protests that the receipt of such a pittance would be unlikely to justify the planning and execution of his plan. The monkey agrees, speculating that this is, in fact, the reason for his continued freedom.

Critical reception[edit | edit source]

Critical reception to anyhoo was overwhelmingly positive. Within five days of its release, someone using the name "Baby Girl" posted the entire script to a blog on MySpace. An assortment of speakers from every nation and religious background praised the video for its cutting-edge Europop soundtrack. Noted film critic Roger Ebert said of the video, "Well, it's not really a movie, and I'm a film critic, but I thought..." Unfortunately, Ebert was not able to finish this thought, as he suffered a massive stroke.

anyhoo in pop culture[edit | edit source]

  • In the popular MMORPG World of Warcraft, the Un-Goro crater is populated with monkeys that resemble the monkey from anyhoo.
  • The German alt-rock quartet Guano Apes borrows a line from anyhoo for the title of one of their songs, "You Can't Stop Me."
  • On YouTube, a video made by twelve-year-old Donnie McGrath references anyhoo. McGrath plays the band Europe's hit single, "The Final Countdown," on a boom box, while repeatedly screaming "I am the monkey and you can't stop me!" The video is fantastically unpopular.
    • Also on YouTube, a video indirectly references anyhoo by responding to McGrath's video. In this video, "tubwarrior55," an overweight Mexican in his late thirties, informs McGrath that his video is of poor quality.
  • Cannons were used in the Battle of Lexington, an obvious reference to anyhoo.
  • In Season 34, Episode 11 of The Simpsons, "Lisa and the Beast," Lisa talks about a monkey who escaped from the zoo, a possible reference to anyhoo.