User:HumphreyJ
Western Alamance High School
History:
When Ann Davis was born in the year 1603 and the world was in ruin, she thought what better way to contribute to this earth than to create a "school of distinction", become dictator of the school, and never even come to the school. Western is known for strong academics, a strong band, and a strong team of teachers. When middle school students at the famous Western Alamance Middle School ask "what could be worse than this school" they soon find out when they make the transition to high school. Since 1603 no improvements have been made on the school besides an addition of a 5th academic building known commonly as 'G-Unit' and a new and stylish cafeteria that seats nearly 50 students.
Sports:
Western Alamance has one of the nations best sports programs in the nation. From Hal Capps Warriors to Mrs. Robertson's Lawn Mower Racing Team the school is filled with athletic ability. The school seems to always be hyped up when football season comes around, but are nearly heart broken because the warriors seem to be very good at finishing second. It is unknown whether or not Western Alamance has a men's basketball team because there have never been any highlights from this area of sports. A newly formed mens(actually i do believe mens and womens?) lacrosse team has captured the spotlight recently. The team seems to have made a vast improvement due to the true focus of one of the star players, who goes by Frankie. Legend has it, you mess with Frankie and he will get stitches. There only seems to be one problem with this new sport and that is that all the players with any talent leave to go to McCallie. Actually one of Western Alamance's themes has shown to be, if you want to be successful in life, then go to a different school.
Famous People from Western Alamance:
none.
Notable Teachers:
Ann Davis- Dictator of the school, but known to many as principal used to run the school (or perhaps run away from the school noting she was present less days than the senior class) but was fired after the school found out she that she had used 64 extra vacation days in one semester. Most students have not yet realized that she is no longer a employee if the school. Dr. Vernon- 3 time award winning teacher of the world, teaches chemistry classes. Looks great in a lab coat, eye protection, and a smile. Get on his good side early or you may have Dr. Bowling. Favorite quote- "Stop Talking". Mrs Robertson- Coach of the Lawn Mower Racing Team and plays a crucial role as a math teacher and a role model. Tried to get out of Western Alamance but was beaten up and forced to return shortly after. Mrs Butler- In charge of the Yearbook Department. I think she is also a teacher. Mr Byers- Great Teacher, but don't get to close to the guy, literally.
Problems with Western Alamance:
1.) Almost 300 students have reportedly died after drinking the school water, yet the cafeteria still finds a way to charge 10 cents for the H20. Hint: when water is clear it is ok to drink, but when it is brown, spend the extra 40 cents and try the flavored water, I mean sweet tea.
2.) African Americans and Country Folk (Rednecks) have experienced recent problems.
3.) Nicki Spritz
4.) The teachers get paid way to much for the job they are doing.
5.) About 11.3 % of those who start Western Alamance High School end up in college, while 84.8 % will make the best decisions of their life and drop out, and only a mere 3.9 % die from boredom.
6.) The school's swimming pool is actually outdoor sewer where poor people come to use the bathroom (including the teachers). Sure there may be rocks on the bottom of the pool and it may smell worse than a front row seat in Byer's class but hey, something is better than nothing.