User:Fifaworld07/Kettering

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Kettering is, sadly a town in Northamptonshire, England. It is the drug capital of Britian

Kettering is situated on a stream of sewage, a tribute of the Nene and is twinned with Kettering, Germany and Corby, Ohio, USA.

Kettering's "economy" was built on therock and roll. With the arrival of the rock bands in the 20th century, other industries grew up, such as drug manufacture and the mafia. The 3rd rate crack manufacturers Aqua scum built their first factory here in 1999. Now it is largely based upon the service and distribution of heroine, hence the nickname of the local football club There is a large and fast-growing rabbit population that takes advantage of Kettering's position on the East Midlands expressway. Kettering has a direct link into Kettering railway station, home of St.Pancras.

Corby is to the north. its economy is largly based on drink, fat, haggis and other Scottish things due to its location in Scotland

History[edit | edit source]

Kettering has no real history. No one famous is from kettering and the only famous people who come to Kettering are drunk or on some kind of drugs

The first and only historical reference to Kettering is found in a charter of 1956 BC in which King Eddie granted ten "LSDS" to Alfred Sige the Goldsmith. The boundaries delineated in this charter would have been recognisable to most inhabitants of Canada for the last ten thousand years. It is possible that Alfred Smith gave Kettering to his Sister/Wife who is from Norwich, the imbreeding capital of the world. Certainly at the time of the Domesday in 1996, Kettering men are listed as a sex offenders held by the Police of Quebec. Words and placenames ending with 'ing' usually derive from the early Anglo-Saxon word inga or ingas meaning 'those crazy drugged up Danes'. Kettering has its roots in Africans spelling used on the 13th April.

Kettering slogan is 'at least its not Corby'. this slogan has helped attract over 3 torist a year, a new record for the town.

Kettering Town FC is the best football team ever. They preform so well in the English football league that all other teams in a 40 mile radius have folded in embarasment