User:ChaosSushi/GunZ

As a result of consuming GunZ, this transvestite stripped and jumped into a bottomless pit in a futile attempt to fly.

“I know when I see all crackers. These guys hate black people!”

- Kanye West on GunZ

GunZ is a dangerous yet addictive hallucinogen that is manufactured by MAIET. (which is the company's attempt to spell TEAM) It is usually taken by injection into the veins. Ingredients contained in GunZ include Maplestory, Matrix candies, and trace amounts of OJ Simpson's wife, all of which are liquified with acid. The drug is unique in that it provides similar hallucinations to all of its consumers. It is also unique because different types provide hallucinations in an exclusive language. GunZ can currently be taken in English, Japanese, Korean, and Indian. Those taking the same type of drug at the same time can interact with each other in hallucinations. GunZ is widely popular worldwide, and over 16000 people on Earth take it daily. Besides hallucinations, symptoms from consuming GunZ include paranoia, cancer, anorexia, obesity, insomnia, bloodshot eyes, profuse sweating, epilepsy, pale skin, sensitivity to the sun, fidgeting, fugliness, short term memory loss, brain atrophy, physical and mental dependence on the drug, confusing hallucinations with real life even if the consumer is not on the drug, mindless babbling and outbursts, AIDs, erectile dysfunction, genital warts, short attention span, obssession with guns, abnormal hair growth, and reverse-puberty.

The Horrifying Truth

No government has any knowledge of the drug, so shut yo mouth!

The GunZ Cult

The GunZ cult sex position

However, police have reported incidents of GunZ worshippers who would ceremoniously light their computer on fire and speak in a language unknown to anyone. These cultists live by the GunZ Bible, written by the many prophets of the GunZ cult. Babies are offered as a sacrifice to these godly prophets so that they can harvest the newborn's soul to live for eternity.

The secret hideout of the cultists is alleged to be called the GunZFactor. The location of the hideout is unknown, but they do have a website!

The Justice League of Jesus has been dispatched to kick the cult's ass. No progress has been reported, though.

The GunZ Bible

Little is known about the GunZ Bible, and those who have not taken the drug and attempted to read the entire book mysteriously died in 7 days. Their colleagues found out within a week and beat him/her to death after a week.

The Gods of GunZ

The ultimate three-headed deity, Jo Baba

GunZ cultists worship a great number of gods. Here is the entire list:

• God, the god.
• Dark Jesus, god of everlasting darkness
• The Tigerzord from Power Rangers, god of falling heads
• The Koopa Troopa Football Players, gods of fertility
• Ralph Nader, god of asexual birth

And of course....

• Jo Baba (not to be confused with Yo Momma), the ultimate three-headed deity composed of Venister the creator, Guntrix the enforcer, and Citizen the penguin.

Hallucination Types

There are many types of hallucinations that the consumer can experience. Newer types being revealed are extremely rare but still possible. These are the known types of hallucinations:

Training: This type of hallucination is intended for the user to get used to the drug. Otherwise there's absolutely no point in it.

Deathmatch: People kill each other.

Team Deathmatch: Two teams of people kill each other.

Beserker: Only one person can achieve the highest point of pleasure, so other people must kill that person to take his/her place. This goes on endlessly.

Gladiator: Originally this hallucination type was intended to be a cooking competition, but consumers were too high to realize that and instead kill each other with blades.

Team Gladiator: Same as Gladiator, except in 2 teams.

Assassination: People are split into two teams. One person from each team has the highest point of pleasure, and the goal is to kill that person on the other team.

Quest: This hallucination type is only available in Korean. In this hallucination type, users can fight monsters, and even fight in "boss battles," in which the users fantasize about killing their boss at work, who then transform into a giant monster. The strongest boss ever is God, who has a ridiculous amount of HP. He can shoot you with his finger, too.

Ladder: Users race against eachother to climb a ladder. What they don't know is that what waits at the top is a 10 foot drop.

Classic: This mode is especially for Erectily Dysfunction Stylers

Team Classic: Like Classic, except in teams.

Survival: Users compete to listen to George Bush's words of wisdom before they commit suicide from learning too much.

Ban War: Users kill someone, then race for the Mexican border. First person who makes it without getting caught wins.

Dual: Two users enter a bathroom and lock the door. Whatever happens inside, stays inside.

Use of Weapons

Below is a list of all the weapons users can wield during hallucinations to kill people.

"To Cap Some Bitch"

Rifles, Submachine Guns, and Machine Guns: The noobiest set of weapons ever. These weapons have an extremely fast rate of fire. Therefore, the user can just close their eyes and hold down on the trigger, letting bullets fly randomly in hopes of killing someone. It is extremely easy to kill with this set of weapons.

Rocket Launchers: The noobiest set of weapons ever. The rocket launcher has a huge rape radius of damage. Therefore, the user will fire this weapon randomly. Sometimes, the wielder will aim at their feet. It is extremely easy to kill with this weapon.

Pistols and Revolvers: The noobiest set of weapons ever. These guns can cap a bitch in just a few shots. Therefore, people die quickly when hit with pistol bullets. It is extremely easy to kill with this set of weapons.

Shotguns: The noobiest set of weapons ever. This weapon is capable of capping some bitch in just one hit. It has a large radius of damage and requires little aim. It is extremely easy to kill with this weapon.

"To Stab Some Bitch"

Sword: The noobiest melee weapon ever. It is capable of pushing people into bottomless pits. It is widely popular amongst Kool Stylers. It is extremely easy to kill with this weapon.

Butter Knife: The noobiest melee weapon ever. It is dunked in Oprah's blood, which is highly poisonous. This poison can paralyze people, of which the Butter Knife wielder can proceed to sodimize their victim, strangle them, then dump them in a river while keeping a clipping of hair as a souveneir. It is extremely easy to kill with this weapon.

Kodachi: If you have any idea what the fuck this is then please call 1-800-555-555-5555. Charges may apply.

"To Throw Babies at Some Bitch"

Nades, not to be confused with grenades, are the children of Ralph Nader. In hallucinations, users can kidnap these children and throw them at their enemies. The children explode on impact and invoke a random effect. These effects include:

• Releasing marijuana
• Revealing the breasts of Britney Spears' true form, thus blinding all gaze upon it
• Causing people to burst into flames

Styles

In GunZ hallucinations, the user is constantly fantasizing about killing others. But the mass of users have determined different styles of fighting. These include:

• Doink Style, named after the infamous Tonberries. Doink Stylers naturally imitate these fugly, fictional creatures.
• Kool Style, the most popular style amongst long-time consumers. Kool Style involves bouncing off of walls and waving your sword and shooting your gun really quickly in hopes of killing someone.
• Erectile Dysfunction Style is used by those who have vaginas. Erectile Dysfunction Stylers think they are playing a game of Counter Strike while having hallucinations.

Forbidden Style

F. Stylers are masters of deceit.

WARNING: If you do not read this section in its entirety, you will die in 7 days.

Most consumers of GunZ are completely ignorant of this style, which is a shame because it totally kicks the other styles' ass. Only the great scholars own the GunZ Bible that describes the ways of this style, written by the prophet filya1. However, the words inscribed in the book are absolute gibberish. Decipherers are absolutely baffled in trying to translate the sacred text. Only those who take the drug can understand it. These are the tome's words:

As K-style is associated with speed, randomness, glitches and as E-stlye is associated with aim, stealth so is F-style associated with dumbness, laziness & the need to delevel

1) Snail : (Not to be confused with Butterfly)

This is a very basic move in F-style. It can and should be used any time it can.

Press Alt-Tab >> open and sign in on all messenger applications you have >> Press F11

This move basically enables you to lag so bad that no one in the game knows where you actually are (and vice versa). Where they see you will be your position a minute back. It can actually be used as an alternative to the GOD mode hack. You can actually come out of any game (even a mansion 16 player death match!) with 0 deaths! (psst...and 0 kills)

2) 0th step aka No-step : (Not to be confused with Half step)

This move too is a very important move in F-style. It enables you to aim flawlessly at your opponent.

Press nothing >> I mean it...nothing! >> Absolutely nothing!

Choose a location in your map where most players converge at. Just rush as fast as you can there and use the 0th step. The trick is in the timing of doing nothing. With practice, you will master the 0th step and then you can actually use it just when everyone is just about to pump you with bullets or slash you to oblivion.

3) Cancel the wall : (not to be confused with wall cancel)

This move enables you to see through walls. Mind you though, not all walls can be seen through. Only walls which have another room or playable terrain on the other side.

Open you CPU cabinet >> remove ur GeForce/Nvidia graphics card >> Replace with $25 card from Ebay

Now when you play Gunz, you can literally see through all the walls and even ceilings of certain rooms (not counting your body itself, your opponents as well, and ofcourse the trucks, crates etc) Now you can see where your opponent is. Your opponent can see you too...but to your advantage : you are not where you seem (refer Snail move)

Note: Try and ignore the blue walls, green floors and the seeming aurora borealis in the sky

4) Massive Sky jump : (Not to be confused with Massive strike)

This move is based on a discovery a fellow gunzfactorian.

It enables you to jump amazingly high. This can give you a very high point of view on the map. But you need a certain combination of weapons/armor to do this move:

Buy 2 of the best rocket launchers and as many grenades as your level and bounty can buy.

Equip grenade >> Look down >> press LMB (and hold!) >> quickly switch to rocket launcher (your rocket will shoot) (still keep LMB pressed) >> switch to next best rocket launcher (that launcher will shoot too) >> look around

This can also be used to negate the wall climb disadvantage of rockets. Cause now you dont have to climb walls...you go higher than them.

Note: if you still dont see a "Wait for 5 seconds" message...use the 0th step.

Despite the knowledge of the Forbidden Style, no one has ever been able to master it. Worshippers of GunZ believe that the one sheman who will be able to master it will become ruler of the GunZ hallucination universe and lead the users to freedom against Oprah

WARNING: The last warning was a typo. It was supposed to say, "If you read this article entirely, you will die in 7 days."