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In the not-too-distant future, way down in Deep 13
Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank were hatching an evil scheme
They hired a temp by the name of Mike, just a regular joe they didn't like
Their experiment needed a good test case, so they conked him on the noggin
And they shot him into space

Mike Nelson: GET ME DOWN!!!!!

"We'll send him cheesy movies, the worst we can find (la la la)
He'll have to sit and watch them all, and we'll monitor his mind" (la la la)
Now keep in mind Mike can't control where the movies begin or end (la la la)
He'll try to keep his sanity with the help of his robot friends

Robot Roll Call
Cambot! (Show yourself!)
Gypsy! (I'm not ready!)
Tom Servo! (Hello there!)
Crooooow! (That's one "o!")

If you're wondering how he eats and breathes and other science facts
Then repeat to yourself, "It's just a show, I should really just relax"
For Mystery Science Theater 3000!