Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/The Last Man on Earth (2)

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The Last Man on Earth

Went through and changed a bit here and there. Would appreciate any feedback.

Humour:	8.5	I found myself laughing frequently throughout the piece, which I attribute greatly to your ability to deliver jokes well. Plot- I found the plot summary to be a tad lengthy, but hilarious nonetheless. You really have a good grasp on joke:text ratio and how to keep it high. I do wonder if you could take out some extraneous bits such as Glover's decision to hide in a Hooters. However, I also am curious to know if you are making a play on the fact that a Hooters would join men in their extinction were it to happen. If so, you may want to clarify the joke by changing it to an abandoned Hooters. You also set up the chauvinistic tone to the plot as well as the article extravagantly here with the many jokes involving objectification of women. Production- Here is where I think you could do a teeny bit more work. You seem to rapidly speed through most of the actors' motives for signing on to the movie. Whether this observation was your intention, I do not know. You described Glover's and Adam's motives sufficiently, but I felt that the Beyonce joke was a cheap laugh (please take no offense, we all love Admiral Ackbar and his knowledge of traps). The Gottfried part was also pretty humorous, but I felt the joke was delivered a tad choppily. Release- Great transitional bit! You do a great job delivering the jokes regarding the male populous and their importance to the producers. It also has a giggle-worthy ending with the yacht part (a nice reference to the article's take on Glover's snobbery). Reception and awards- I loved your inclusion of the unexpected, "were there a calculator available, the grand total would be known." The discounting of its Oscar nomination was also quite humorous, as was the clear focus on the Razzie awards associated with the film. Also, drowning puppies in lava is a great example of what one would do instead of watching this movie. Controversy- I actually woke up the people in the next apartment over when I read this bit. You already had me laughing with, "...the message of male dominance was abandoned in the middle of the movie in order to make room for more cat fights and sex scenes." You exacerbated my laughter when you inserted the muslim female joke to further the effect. Also, nice idea with the lawsuit from the low-rate porn company. You set it up well by calling him the CEO only to knock him off of the professional pedestal by citing car repairs as the reason for his bankruptcy. Legacy- I am not sure if I speak for others, but I actually enjoyed this part. It's short, sweet, and it summarizes the article very well.
Concept:	9	What would women do if men were to cease existence? The rhetorical question raised after reading this article assures me that your idea is comedic gold. Despite some minor changes, you have yourself a wonderful concept along with a great satirical voice.
Prose and formatting:	7.5	Your grammatical skills and ability to take on a formal tone are great for the most part. However, I did notice a few misspellings ("singed" instead of "signed," "then" instead of "than," etc.) and awkward sentence structures. If you would like me to help you further with these corrections, feel free to ask.
Images:	8.5	I love nothing more than images made funny by their captions. Surely a picture speaks a thousand words, but sometimes you need a couple more words to make it successful. You pulled this feat off marvelously, and I commend you for your ability to do so.
Miscellaneous:	8.4	The numbers speak: your article is of very high quality!
Final Score:	41.9	I leave you with these words, my talented peer. Nothing is ever perfect, but you can always try to make it such. Usually in doing so you can make vast improvements. I think this article has great potential (eventual VFH at that), but it needs that final push to be truly magnificent. Keep at it- you have the ability to accomplish great things with your literary skills.
Reviewer:	S3ahawk 06:59, August 19, 2010 (UTC)