Uncyclopedia:Featured articles/April 30

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Prohibition wastage.jpg

Prohibition was a former American government policy created in an effort to try and destroy fun, one of three policies around the same period alongside The Great Depression and The Manhattan Project. Like all things sinister it was conspired by the Republicans in the 1920s and then repealed in 1933 by the Democrats. The reason: "We got so caught up in prohibition we forgot how good it feels to get fucked up."

As you might have guessed by now, banning alcohol in a time where most of society was dirt poor did not sit well with the masses. Illegal alcohol was manufactured in every corner of the country, often laced with methanol and other adulterants to make the profit margins larger and killing off customers. Although alcohol did become illegal, very few people found themselves being punished at the hands of law enforcement, partly because the law makers forgot to factor in that most of the police enjoyed their booze as much as the next man.

Prohibition was largely pushed by supermodel Carrie Nation and her disciples who continued to badger innocent people long after her death. The only people who approved of prohibition were other Christians (are you even surprised?) and other assorted losers. (Full article...)