UnNews:Racist fan still thinks a white coach would have beaten Dungy in the Super Bowl

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6 February 2007

A blatant violation of city cross-burning ordinances.

CHICAGO, Bears Illinois -- protests from one man in Chicago, Illinois have grabbed the nation's attention as being probably the most eccentric proclamation of stupidity thus far of 2007. The man, 27-year old Ray Cist, a Chicago native, told reporters this afternoon after he was arrested last night for leaving a burning cross on the front lawn of Indianapolis Colts coach Ted Dungy, "Back in my day, we wouldn't let the game be won by these ******s and gooks. Nothin' but a bunch of ***** ******s and chinks. White Power!"

Cist was booked on two separate charges on a $20,000 bail, the first for not having a city permit to burn crosses in peoples' front lawns, and the second for violating city cross burning ordinances, which restrict the dimensions of a burning cross within city limits.

"I mean, it's not so much that he's not a good coach," explained Cist, "it's just that he's black." Cist's comments come after the AFC Indianapolis Colts beat the NFC Chicago Bears 27-19 at Super Bowl XLI. "A white coach should've beaten Dungy," elaborated Cist again, "You start lettin' the blacks win Super Bowls as coaches, and then they'll start wantin' their own drinking fountains, their own seats on the bus, the integration of schools, and then, you have a goddamn Civil Rights Movement!"

Ted Dungy has made no comment thus far regarding the matter, but an AFC spokesman stated the following: