Kansas City

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Kansas City, Missouri, is best known for BBQ and Jazz. BBQ and Jazz were invented simultaneously on 18th & Vine when man named Mo tried to play the saxophone while cooking a heifer.

Kansas City celebrated its centennial with the motto: "One Hundred Years of Crime." The median household income is 2 cents per year.


Kansas City is 50% Baptist, 12% Catholic, 6% Methodist, 3% Pentecostal, 3% Latter-day Saint, 3% Lutheran, 1% Unity and 1/8th Satanist.

Tourist attractions[edit]

There are many sites to see, including fountains, tornadoes, and the site of the beginning of the Santa Fe, California, and Oregon Trails, which is basically just some dirt.

Famous people[edit]

Mickey Mouse, that one guy, some other people


In 2016, the students in Kansas City, MO, received the worst scores in the state, while their teachers got the worst marks in the nation on their teacher tests. The superintendent of the schools is changed every year, but to no avail. Kansas City maintains many colleges and libraries anyway.