I AM ACTUALLY LADY DIANA SPENCER AND I AM STILL ALIVE, IS NOW TIME TO COME BACK

HEY PEOPLE, DO YOU READ ME? I AM LADY D, THE REAL ONE, BELIEVE ME. I'M STILL ALIVE AND I'M COMING BACK.

GUESS WHO'S BACK?

THAT'S RIGHT, THE CAR ACCIDENT WASN'T REAL AND MY DEATH WAS HALF-FAKED. TECHNICALLY, I ACTUALLY DID DIE. ON THE PLUS SIDE, I HAVE BEEN REANIMATED!

HOW??

WELL, SINCE QUEEN ELIZABETH HAS NOW PASSED INTO THE ETHERAL PLANE, HER WITCHCRAFT SPELL ON MY CORPSE ACTIVATED, AND I AM NOW FREE TO ROAM THIS EARTH AND BE JUST AS POPULAR AS I WAS IN THE 90'S.

YOU'VE BEEN REPLACED

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, "I'VE BEEN REPLACED?"

THERE'S ANOTHER PRINCESS THAT LEFT THE ROYAL FAMILY

WHAT THE FUCK, REALLY?

YES, AND SHE LEFT OF HER OWN VOLITION, AND CONVINCED HER ROYAL HUSBAND TO LEAVE WITH HER

THAT'S UNBELIEVABLE! IS SHE HOTTER THAN ME?

THAT'S PRETTY SUBJECTIVE, BUT I'D SAY NO

THANK PROTESTANT GOD. SPEAKING OF HOT EX-MEMBERS OF THE ROYAL FAMILY, WOULD YOU BE INTERESTING IN DONATING YOUR BRAIN TO FEED ME? NOT EATING FOR 25 YEARS HAS LEFT ME FAMISHED!

WELL, YOU ARE FAMOUS, SO I GUESS SO

AREN'T YOU JUST THE SWEETEST! I'LL ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU AS MY FIRST ZOMBIFICATION VICTIM... WHATEVER YOUR NAME IS.

MY NAME IS-

Thus begins Princess Diana's Endless Reign of Blood, Guts, & Entrails. Be prepared to submit!