Emo Teenager

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Emo Teenager. As you can see the average emo is extremely bored.

Emo Teenager (Stuttgart 15/12/361-14/02/377) was born to a German playwright and a French chambermaid. After spending his formative years at the Staatsgalerie, his estranged uncle brought back a Bartolomeo Cristofori harpsichord from his recent trip to Rome which started his famed music career and co-created the genre known now as Emo with Emo Phillips. A lot of E.M.O.'s (Excesively mocked ordinaries) are known to be Bi-Sexual and fantasise about being the opposite sex. Emos suck usually. They suck cock

Gothic War (377-382) (The Balkans)[edit | edit source]

After his death, The Visigoths and Ostrogoths joined together to fight The Emos. With much stronger forces, the twin-pronged attack of the Visigoths and Ostrogoths defeated the Emos, the most well known of the casualties being Rites Of Spring, Fire Party and One Last Wish.

One Last Wish that is, "to eat that cherry pie."

Gothic War (535–552) (Italy)[edit | edit source]

Unlike the first, more widely known Gothic war, described above, the Italian Gothic War was fought against, not the Emos, but the boy band uprising in Rome. As with the previous war, most casualties were on the opposing side, most famous of all were New Kids On The Block, Hanson and Bros.

A weakness was found in the emos though. A young girl recently committed suicide after being forced to listen to the Soulja Boy. Your Gay

The Continuing War[edit | edit source]

After the wars, "The Goths", as they had become known, retreated, believing the battle to be over. Unfortunately, this has allowed there eternal adversaries to become stronger an take over the reins as the largest forces in the music industry, a position that became less stable in the 3 decades following the 1960s, with the emergence of rock, and later the NWOBHM, but is now stronger than ever. This caused sporadicly to small bands of rogue emos to flee into an area of space known as the Eye of Terror (The eye one can see behind an emo's bad haircut) There the emos slowly build up and army and a space fleet, trying to overrun the Gothic sector. The most important planet in this sector is Port Maw, its capital. With TMST Andrew Kepple its planetary governor. It is ringed with hundreds of bastion stations, monitor ships, defence satellites, and spacial minefields, installed and operated by the Adeptus Metallicus. Early in the twenty first century the massed emo fleet attacked Port Maw, but faced with such awesome defences, (and Chuck Norris) the Emo fleets were restricted to terror raids and sabotage missions, though the system was blockaded for almost the entirety of the Gothic War. The only ship that survived the "Port Maw Carnage" was the arcane ship "My Comical Grievance."