User talk:Oneplusoneistwo

The Legend Of The Giant Evil Penguin

It is said that there was a giant evil penguin that haunted the hills of Antarctica. The penguin supposedly came out only at night just like in some cheesy horror movie. This so called penguin then reeked havoc on the dolphins in the area. The giant penguin and the dolphins would than fight a great battle in which the dolphins usually beat the living piss out of the penguin with a giant block of ice. The giant penguin would then call upon the help of Goodzilla who would make it so the dolphins didn't exist anymore with his fire breath. This supposedly went on for weeks until Superdy Duper Jesus would but in and call off the dolphins usually saying, "Just wait until Ultra God hears about this"

Proving the Legend

For many years researchers attempted to prove the existence of the penguin but with no luck. The Commander in Chimp has stated that the penguin does not exist. However, due to the fact that his approval rating is so low nobody knows what to believe. There was no sign of ever finding this enormous penguin until recently when one of the people searching for evidence of the Giant Evil Penguin was suddenly found completly spiffed (drunk) and speaking of an enormous penguin. Soon after this other researchers were found spiffed and rambling about a giant penguin. It has become the accepted belief that one can only see the Giant Evil Penguin if they are intoxicated.

Goodzilla's Involement with the Giant Evil Penguin

Until recently it was thought that the involement of Goodzilla in connection with the Giant Evil Super Penguin was a myth due to the fact that the Canadian movie was not filmed until the early 50's. Howver, this theory was proven incorrect when Goodzilla attacked the dolphins that has so threatened the Giant Evil Penguin. With its fire breath Goodzilla would melt the ice of the Arctic and then descend to the caverns of the deep where the evil dolphins were hiding. Goodzilla would then rip one dolphin at a time out of the water and snap it in half ending each dolohin's life in a second.Goodzilla and the Giant Evil Penguin are now great friends and have destroyed the population of dolphins in the Arctic, which is probably why nobody has ever seen dolphins in Antarctica.

The Commander in Chimp, Himself

The Commander In Chimp

The Commander in Chimp is better known as George W. Bush is the only human being that proves the theory of evolution to be true due to his stunning resemblance to a monkey. However, the Commander in Chimp's IQ is much lower than that of the average primate, This is why it is still the theory of evolution and not "The Fact of Life That Happens to be Called Evolution." The Commander in Chimp is actually a pawn of the evil Head Primate also known as Dick Cheney. Being a pawn of the Evil Monkey-Like Corporation, the Commander in Chimp has been convinced that everything he does is perfectly justified and intelligent. The Commander in Chimp's current approval rating of 34 percent begs to differ.

Shunning

A popular slogan that holds more truth than many think.

The Species of Chimps has recently shunned the Commander in Chimp for they did not wish to be digraced by his low intelligence. They have also declared that the Commander in Chimp a new species. This is due to his surprisingly low IQ.

Knife Fight With Leader Chimp

Here you can see the Leader Chimp Being Cheered on by fellow anti-idiots.

The Commander in Chimp was angered by the decistion that he was too stupid to be a chimp and challenged the Leader Chimp to a knife fight. The Leader Chimp accepted this and the fight was scheduled a few months from then on a boat outside of International Waters. On Febuary 31, 2006, a day that was soon to become a red letter day in American History, the Leader Chimp shoved his knife in the Commander in Chimp, ending his life.

Effects of Presidency

The Commander in Chimp, despite his lack of intelligence, set an example for others to follow after the end of his presidency. His example showed that only smart people should be elected into office. Many thought that the Government needed to get in touch with the commom people so they wanted a stupid president to which they could relate. Sadly this was not a good idea. We now know that we should have a smart president that doesn't get along well with the common folk and not a monkey like person that does.