User:Tripod2282/The Credibles
The Credibles are a believable American family of heroes, battling the faces of not-so-pleasantry. These credible feats include the ordinary danger of:
- Driving to the store without wearing seatbelts.
- Calling the cable guy to get the television fixed.
- Preparing microwave dinners.
- Cracking open a beer, only to have it fizz all over
- Banging your knee against a coffee table.
- Scrubbing the carpet after the dog puked on it.
- Eating freezer-burned leftovers.
- Changing the baby.
- Suffering through visits from the annoying next-door neighbors.
Right now, you're probably thinking "That's possible!". Well, it's not only possible, it's CREDIBLE!
A credible story[edit | edit source]
We join our heroes at home, making heroes. But, something possible happens. They are out of bread!
Helen: Bob, our guests are going to be here in five minutes!
Bob: Guests?! Who's coming over?
Helen: I told you this morning! Edna and Syndrome are coming over!
Bob: What?! That's credible!
Helen: I know! Now shut up and help me!
Bob: What are you making?
Helen: Hoagies. Now, where's the bread?
Bob has a flashback to earlier, that very same day, to when he decided to make an enormous sandwich.
Bob: Oh no! I ate it all!
Helen: You asshole! Now what are we going to serve to our guests?!
The doorbell rings.
Helen: Oh crap! They're here!
Bob: Quick! What should we do?
Helen: I'll distract them. You run to the store.
Bob: Run? What's wrong with the car?!
Helen: JUST GO!
Helen opens the door for Edna and Syndrome.
Syndrome: Howdy doody, neighbor! I brought the playin' cards.
Edna: Dahling you look wonderful. Have you done something with your hair?
Helen: Well, actually...
Edna: Fantastic dahling. Where's Bob?
Helen: Uh, he'll be along in a little while.
Meanwhile, at the store, Bob looks for the bread.
Bob: The bread! Where the hell is the bread?! I need customer assitance!
Bob frantically looks around for an employee.
Bob: Excuse me, where are the hoagie buns?
Employee with acne: Uh, aisle five.
Bob: Thanks.
While Bob drives home, Helen frantically tries to entertain their annoying guests.
Edna: ...and so she says to me that she said to her that she said to her that Barbara told her that Sheala said to Shirley that she wore the same dress to Marges funeral as she did to Millies wedding. Terrible, dahling. But don't let me start to bore you. Please, tell me if I'm talking too much.
Helen: Well...
Edna: Fantastic, dahling. Oh, you simply must see Maureens new hat. Talk about tacky, dahling...
Bob bursts in the door, holding a bag of hoagie buns.
Helen: Oh! Look, here's Bob with the bread! Now we can make the hoagies.
Bob: By the way, honey, did you remember to pick up the cheese yesterday?
Helen: ...
And so, our heroes were almost able to enjoy their heroes. Just remember, they're not just possible, they're CREDIBLE! ...Oh, thank God that shit is over. I need a stiff drink. What? What do you mean the microphone is still on? Well, how do you turn it off? What red button? Oh, that one ri