User:TheGenderBender/America's Deadliest Celebrities
This is a guide to help you identify America's most dangerous celebrities, this could potentially save your life.
These are only a few of the many dangerous celebrities in America.
Conan O'Brien[edit | edit source]
'conanis stupidius hairus' This predator is seemingly harmless. It lures you onto their talkshow and a guy called Max will play drums for you. While you are distracted by the music Conan's hair will detach from his head and swallow you whole. You will be slowly digested by the toxic hair gel. Celebrities, stay off "Late Night with Conan O'Brien".
The Governator[edit | edit source]
'austrius terminatus' The Govenator, aka. Arnold Schwarzenegger is an extremely dangerous predator and should be approached with extreme caution. It can incapacitate you with loud Austrian ramblings such as "get down!!!!" or "get to da chopper!!!". It will then move in with a very powerful knee-drop to the chest which can possible kill you, if you try to shoot it or anything it will simply regenerate then rip your head off. DO NOT LET THE GOVERNATOR GOVERN YOUR CITY!!!
Michael Jackson[edit | edit source]
'pervertius petiphilius plasticsurgius' Michael Jackson preys on little boys usually under the age of 10, he will lure them with candy and take them into his bedroom or into a mens bathroom. His face alone is enough to paralyze a child for life, he wears one white glove and can be seen wearing a surgical mask to keep the germs away. If you encounter a Michael Jackson simply grab onto its face and pull, it will come straight off. Do not attemped to kick it in the balls because he doesn't have any.