User:Sycamore/Wendy Alexander

Don't try and act as if you haven't thought of it

Wendy Alexander (born Gordon Brown; 27 June 1963, Glasgow) was the first Transexual leader of the "English Labour Party in Scotland". She is more commonly known as London's Pet Bulldog, she used to wrestle, hence her Anti-SNP slogan "BRING IT ON!".

Alex Salmond has already declared that when Scotland is independent, she will get a government position; The President's foot-rest. She has tried to call the SNP's bluff on many an occasion without much success, she did, however, succeed in making Salmond cry when she resigned, this being because everytime she appeared on telivision SNP support went up by 20% each time.

She has already declared that after Gordon Brown betrayed her in her quest for a Scottish Independence referendum she will be running for Prime Minister of England........I mean the United Kingdom. She even once compared Salmond to Nazi leader Adolf Hitler, which of course nobody took seriously when she quite obviously is the one with the moustache.

She is an avid Rangers Football Club supporter, however, she vigourisly denies rumours that Sir David Murray has donated £5 plus a scarf saying "Awa The Fenians", along with her many donations that she has denied in the past such as, "A Kick Up The Arse" from Alex Salmond, A copy of Paris Hilton's latest book "How to be Whore" (which Wendy has read many times obviously) & a lifetime membership of the Orange Order. Apparently during her time as leader of the English Labour Party in Scotland she also was sponsored by Tampax due to her going through a bad period.

She has also apparently started calling her brother, Douglas Alexander, "The Exorcist" apperently because everytime he visits her house all the spirits disappear.

Wendy Alexander, Tony Blair & Rev. Ian Paisley are all sitting boasting about their possessions.
Wendy: I have the biggest gob in all of Europe, I bet you can't lick that!
Tony: I have the poorest approval ratings in political history, I bet you can't lick that!
Rev. Ian: I have a donkey with a skittery arse, I bet you can't lick that!

Film & Television Appearances

• The Monster of The Black Lagoon as the Monster.
• Shrek as the crazy old woman.
• The Incredible Hulk as the Hulk.
• Only An Excuse as a disgruntled Rangers Fan.
• The League of Extraordinary Orange Men as a bigot.

Close Allies

• Adolf Hitler
• Paris Hilton
• The Orange Order
• Rangers Football Club
• Tony Blair