User:Rubber donkey/Caleb Carver (drummer)

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Life and Times of Caleb Carver.

Caleb Carver was born on 4th May 1998 to parents John and Joanne Carver in Peterborough Hospital.

Carver received his first drum kit for Christmas, aged 2; and showed promise from the very beginning. At the age of 10 Carver because the youngest person in the UK to pass their grade 8 drum examination.

Carver attended Bourne Grammar School, and naturally excelled in music; despite getting an E in his final music GCSE. (This was down to his teacher losing all previous coursework, and Carver forgetting his drum sticks on the day of his performance - not even his best efforts of plainly slapping the drums could help him muster up a passing grade). Carver also showed promise in other academic areas, for instance history. Carver achieved an A* in his final GCSE examination, and claims that this grade was largely down to the help of his fellow classmates - Matt "Eriksen-sen-sen" Jackson, Lucas "What if we're all dead" Price, and not to mention Dominic 'Waste-man' Townsend; as stated in Carver's recent autobiography - "I'm in a band".

Carver has stated that he is working on the second installment to his autobiography series, the new addition entitled: "The Drums and Me - 'Ba Dum Tss'". A book which will describe Carver's brief relationship with a drum kit itself two years ago, however this relationship was short lived after Carver was publicly humiliated after a video leaked that showed him attempting to make love to a fucking drum kit. "I was just trying to really connect with the music, get closer to the vibes; you know what I mean?" he claimed in an interview with a local paper.

Caleb Carver has claims he has plans for the future, he recently stated that he has already decided to engrave the words: "What are we doing?" on his gravestone; a phrase he used very frequently during his time at school.

  • This photo was taken just after Carver had climaxed due to being in close proximity of a storm-trooper, something he was known to have had a fetish for.

    This photo was taken just after Carver had climaxed due to being in close proximity of a storm-trooper, something he was known to have had a fetish for.

  • Caver was also known for being a bit of a 'lady-killer' at school, and this photo just proves how he got that tag.

    Caver was also known for being a bit of a 'lady-killer' at school, and this photo just proves how he got that tag.

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