User:RHolbrook/Article about stuff
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“You might think you've seen emo, but this band is ridiculous!”
| Blood Red Heart Explosion | |||
| Origins | Small town, USA | ||
| Year(s) active | 2000 - 2000 (lol) | ||
| Genre(s) | Emo Emo Metal Emo Punk Emo-Emo | ||
| Label(s) | Kitten Huff Entertainment | ||
| Members | Current Members: Herman Risst James Bloodheart Jacoby Shaddix Razordeath | ||
Blood Red Heart Explosion is a super-emo band from any number of small mid-western towns in the US that might play host to such blatant bastardization of teenage culture. Yeah, anywhere where the emos run rampant...
Early History[edit | edit source]
BRHE began in 1995 when a small emo boy by the name of Aaron Small began a quest to create a musical revolution. However, he did not have any knowledge of the music industry, music production or any of the fundamentals needed to succeed in the business. So he decided to hook up with somebody who did. And of course, when we say hook up, we mean literally...he was actually discovered drunk at a high school party, hooking up with his best friend James Ashcroft, otherwise known as The God of Metal.
After repeatedly denying that they were "not gay", Aaron and James decided to form a band. But first they needed new names. James decided that his last name was too "middle-class white boy" so he changed it to "Bloodheart" after what happened to him when his ex-girlfriend punched him in the chest after a breakup. Aaron decided his whole name was too conformist, so he changed from Aaron to 'Herman' because German names are fucking cool, and his last name to Risst, because by this point he was prone to cutting it and misspelling things is for non-conformists. From this point on, they were going to write songs about break ups, cutting various parts of their bodies and non-conformity, cos that's deep, man!
It was soon discovered that neither Risst nor Bloodheart could actually play any instruments. Well, Risst had played in the snare line in his school marching band, but that doesn't count! Plus playing in a marching band is so conformist...it like, writes the book on conformity. So Bloodheart got his brother's guitar, and starting strumming the same powerchord in varying frequencies over and over again while Risst read one of his lame poems, which he'd only written that afternoon about a girl that snubbed him at the supermarket. Tom "Christian-death" Markson, who was a couple of houses over trying to play death metal while compensating for his complete lack of talent, heard the two and decided to lend his services. I mean come on, how hard could it be?
The boys welcomed him, but felt he needed a new name. Christian-death was just too conflicting with the good religious values that the boys retained under their pseudo-hardcore exterior. Reaching into the back pocket of his ridiculously tight jeans, Herman pulled out a shiny, sharp implement traditionally used for shaving and said, "From now, my brother in 'music'...you shall be known as Razordeath!"
Making it BIG! (in a world so small)[edit | edit source]
Now that BRHE had an almost-complete line up, the band needed to find a bass player, and fast. After all, everybody knows the bass player is the coolest and least gay in the whole band, so they decided to move to California for inspiration. Of course, the sunshine and abundance of cool kids did nothing for their output, it simply made them more depressed. So after attempting to cut themselves and whining for attention for a while, they wandered the streets aimlessly, smoking and getting beaten up by the bigger kids.
Meanwhile, Jacoby Shaddix, who was just hitting it big with his band, Papa Roach, was working at a local record store to pay the rent. He didn't have much to do while waiting for his money to come in, so while standing outside his shop having a smoke he noticed the three boys. Seeing three people dressed like him and smoking made him realize he needed to stop making Nu-metal and start making some real music!
"Guys!" he shouted, bounding down the front steps. "I'll be in your band, I'll help you out!"
The last known incarnation of BRHE was born...
Recording an album[edit | edit source]
After having just recorded an album with Papa Roach, Shaddix knew exactly what the band needed to do; sign with a major label. After various failied attempts to sign with a legit company, they eventually settled on Kitten Huff Ent.