User:P4raDoXx/The Book of Norris

The Book of Norris is one of the 13 lost biblical gospels, which describes the great regn of Chuck Norris the Omnipotent. a long time ago, before the brith of Christ, Chuck norris wasnt the physical being he has embodyed himself within today. he was an all powerful being, a god, and existed during the time of creation. for over 6000 years chuck norris ruled the earth, his power bestowed upon him by God on the last day of creation: (chapter 1:33) "And on the seventh day God rested, and Chuck Norris took over." The holy tome details the history of the world from the perspective of Chuck Norris, and focuses especially on the doings of his chosen people, the Norrisites. ( today known as "Aztecs") the book ends with Norris' decention to earth, where he enters the flesh of a man.

In the Beginning...

"1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. 

2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. 

3 And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light. 4 God saw that the light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness. 5 God called the light "day," and the darkness he called "night." And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day. 

6 And God said, "Let there be an expanse between the waters to separate water from water." 7 So God made the expanse and separated the water under the expanse from the water above it. And it was so. 8 God called the expanse "sky." And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day. 

9 And God said, "Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear." And it was so. 10 God called the dry ground "land," and the gathered waters he called "seas." And God saw that it was good. 

11 Then God said, "Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds." And it was so. 12 The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. 13 And there was evening, and there was morning—the third day. 

14 And God said, "Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years, 15 and let them be lights in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth." And it was so. 16 God made two great lights—the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars. 17 God set them in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth, 18 to govern the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness. And God saw that it was good. 19 And there was evening, and there was morning—the fourth day. 

20 And God said, "Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the expanse of the sky." 21 So God created the great creatures of the sea and every living and moving thing with which the water teems, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. 22 God blessed them and said, "Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the water in the seas, and let the birds increase on the earth." 23 And there was evening, and there was morning—the fifth day. 

24 And God said, "Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind." And it was so. 25 God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good.

26 Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground."

31 God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the sixth day. Now God looked upon his creation and was pleased. Then Chuck Norris came out of the sky

33 And on the seventh day God rested, and Chuck Norris the Omnipotent took over 

34 Now Chuck Norris looked upon what he had been given, and saw that it sucked."