User:Nacky/Article about stuff
I done found myself a page that I didn't even know I had! And what's more is when I noticed this after all this time, I don't even know how it's even still here. So I'll use it. 2008 was the last edit on it. What the hell happened in 2008? It wasn't really a good year.
Blurbs[edit | edit source]
After many years of inactivity due to not being able to escape Earth the old-fashioned way, and begrudgingly accepting my horrible fate until I can hijack a stupid spaceship from "Bob", I seem to be around again and causing all kinds of trouble. Anyway I'm determined to remain bitchy and unforgiving of the oligarchs of world domination, so, I've written up articles about Q peoples who are angering them. I've written the truth about them. Not the typical stuff you'd expect. For example it's a friggin military operation to take down the insane psychopaths who keep trying to kill me and send everyone's lunch money to a thug in the new Middle East of Europe. So there's Steinbart who just happens to be an expert at old 18-wheelers on dangerous roads. Flynn is a Q people. That kind of thing. Yep. I like it. Note that JFK Jr still seems to be in limbo, between worlds, but when he's doing the being alive thing, he goes by Kribs. Then it's off to Saturn.
My Interests[edit | edit source]
Greek, Viking, and the Classic Age mythology is something I'm really interested in. I could write up pages for miles on this stuff. Same with Lord of the Rings. I eat, sleep and breathe Tolkien. And Homer. In the land of Hyrule.
When I'm in the Mood[edit | edit source]
Sometimes if I feel like it, I will share some deep thoughts.
I once saw a voodoo witch doctor stirring the pot and the next thing anyone knew, the island's volcano erupted.
Wicker armor! It doesn't really do anything, it's just decorative.
That's the extra umph that everybody needs. Anyway, I like bubbles.
Was anyone aware that there are more Dollar Generals than people in any given region? The actor playing the Dollar General staff member said the word 'Replicating' and it's like, it was a dead giveaway.
The French Cab Driver[edit | edit source]
The one from Curse of the Pink Panther. That one. Space Force pilots remind me of that guy. Doesn't speak English, but actually does. Just don't wanna help. So anyway. Forget that. I have all these stories. And they survived. Some I wish I was never involved in. But some things seem alright. Like the story I was involved in when Attila the Hun got drunk and wrecked Mongolia. It wasn't aliens that put that naval ship in the Gobi Desert. That was Attila. Mr. X is a really cool guy. Not at all like that French cab driver or Attila. But I suppose there's a little of those characters in all of us. Especially if we ever find ourselves driving upside down.
Oh I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen fire rain down hazardous spray from a plane
I saw the time when the Chinese dug out a trench
But I always thought that they could, at least, speak French...
Gilligan's Sailor Hat[edit | edit source]
A hat made of white canvas and sturdy thread, his hat has been seaworthy and long-lasting. A typical hat style that has been worn by practically everyone who lives on or around ocean environments. Even some sharks have been known to wear the style of hat, but Gilligan made it a famous fashion statement. High winds and other incidents have cause him to loose his hat every now and then. I know how he feels.
Tom Bombadil's Beard[edit | edit source]
I mean, this guy is the most notorious hippy in Middle Earth. Some other old guys have beards too, but old Tom was just being over-the-top with it. He's married to Dingleberrry, or was that Goldberry? Anyway his beard is totally out of control. Went to his house the other day, basically asking for directions since I'm not too familiar with the Old Forest. After Fangorn, I've been wary of using thick wooded areas as a suitable hermit setting. Fucking Ents. Anyway, so he opens the door and starts welcoming me with some kind of chanting and singing about the lands. To help me better understand where I was. I guess a fucking map was out of the question. But his beard kept moving on its own. Like it had a life of its own. He offered me an ale. I don't know what the fuck was in it, but I swear that his beard turned into a miniature big foot and it started to growl! Then all of a sudden Bilbo, Frodo, and Gandalf came in. Then they all started to play this weird game where they all tried on this ring that Bilbo had. Eventually he would end up giving it to Frodo, but for the time being it was Bilbo's ring. But they were all trying it on and disappearing. Gandalf didn't try it on, he kept tossing it in Tom's fire pit. But Bilbo, Frodo, and Tom were playing hide and re-appear with it. The only one who was obviously not doing it right was Tom. Since he never vanished. But the other two did vanish when they put it on. I'm 99% positive that it was Tom's goddamned beard that hindered his skill at trying on the ring properly. I did see him wearing it, but he obviously had some issues, or was just retarded. I had to leave after that, I just couldn't take it anymore.
Atlantis[edit | edit source]
Gus, things are really weird here.