User:Marcos Malo/Bavarian Order of the Spork

If any ancient manuscripts had been found detailing the Bavarian Order of the Spork, you can be sure they would have had insignia such as the one above.

Award given by the Bavarian Illuminati to recognize good sportsmanship, dedication to sporkishness, going two weeks or more without a shower, a bad case of carbs, opposing Oprah and defending Scientology, opposing Scientology and defending Oprah, and/or faith in the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Also for any reasons the Illuminati want. Their ways are mysterious.

History of the Order

A spork is neither or a spoon or a fork, and so is a very mysterious object. Almost nothing is known of their early history, other than an obvious link to Bavaria and to useful cutting utensils, suitable of piercing food but also gently scooping it in that sporky like manner. Links to the KKKSpoon and Fork Club are usually in the southern states of bensham, next to chubbies, blue door near the bottom, shady fivers at best

Recipients of Note

• Dr. Wilhelm "Goose-Step Mama" von Spork
• Mark J. Malo ^{S7fc BOotS}

King Sporken

His name actually was, King Realtor difocious cups goosey farticous pumpkin potato leaf Erickson buzz light-year egg brutal purple tofu chicken pot pie Princeton bile black and white yugbxsyjz5qwiyxbhnzfduy5%^W*(IOK@UHGHfncbisdulzxcvvbnm,./441634 Sporken the 12344651459214382734628124194093428937236th. He was a rather bent spork descended from the incinerator down the hall (that will murder you if you say 'i like to eat apples and bananas'.) therefore since his main diet consisted of apples and bananas he had to move or else all was doomed.

This Shit's Real

No, seriously, this is the real deal. Just go to Bavaria and see for yourself. You can't miss it.