User:Kwakerjak/James Buchanan (rw)

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

James Buchanan (April 23, 1791 – June 1, 1868) was the 15th president of the United States (1857–1861). He was the only bachelor president and the only resident of Pennsylvania to hold the office of President. He has been criticized for failing to prevent the country from sliding into the American Civil War. On Buchanan's final day as president, he remarked to the incoming Abraham Lincoln, "If you are as happy entering the presidency as I am in leaving it, then you are truly a happy man. And while I'm on the subject of gaiety: woof."

Biography and early career[edit | edit source]

Childhood[edit | edit source]

(Lancaster County, PA)

Early adulthood[edit | edit source]

Political Career[edit | edit source]

Election of 1856[edit | edit source]

Presidency[edit | edit source]

Scott v. Sanford[edit | edit source]

Buchanan knew that the issue of slavery was tearing the country apart, and that it had to be resolved as soon as possible. It would take a decisive leader to accomplish such a feat, someone who could navigate the political quagmire of regional politics and ethical conundrums that went hand in hand with the South's so-called "peculiar institution." Unfortunately, Buchanan was busy selecting fabrics with which to reupholster the ratty old sofa just outside the entrance to the Oval Office,[1] so he passed the buck off to Chief Justice Roger B. Taney.

The Lecompton Constitution[edit | edit source]

Election of 1860[edit | edit source]

Secession[edit | edit source]

Later years[edit | edit source]

{{USpresident}}

  1. What? It clashed with the carpeting.