User:John Lydon/RPG/10
You burst through the stage entrance and sprint for the main stage. Unfortuantely for you, you seem to have forgotten that you are hideousely overweight and the added stress on your heart from the short sprint has caused it to go into defibrillation. As you lay there, gasping for air and clutching your chest, a small roar begins to swell in the crowd. As the roars grow louder, through a mixture of tears, sweat, and bacon grease, you see a man running towards you. He kneels by your side just as you slip into darkness.
You awake to the sound of a bird chirping in the distance. "What a crazy dream I just had." you think to yourself. You decide to go downstairs and see what mother has made for lunch. As you try to sit up, a slight tug on your arm causes you to stop. "What the hell is this?" a small IV line is attached to your arm. You look around, and realize that you are in a hospital room. "So it wasn't a dream then." A nurse walks into your room. "Good morning sir. You sure are lucky to be alive." "What happened?" you ask, unable to remember anything after falling to the floor. "You don't remember?" the nurse asks. "If I remembered what had happened, why the hell would I ask you what happened" you mumble under your breath. "No I don't remember." you reply, trying to control your anger.
"Well, it's all over the news. Here let me turn it on for you." The overly cheery nurse flips on the TV set mounted to the ceiling of you room. She surfs the channels until she reaches CNN. "In other news today, Simon Cowell, the creator and star of American Idol, can add one more title to his list. Hero. Simon succesfully performed CPR on a heart attack victim last night during the live broadcast of the American Idol finale. The man, who is unidentified, is believed to be a homeless vagrant who snuck into the theatre for warmth. He is reported to be on his way to recovery at St. Luke's memorial hospital today. Back to you in the studio Frank." "Thanks Diane. I guess that makes Simon a real American Idol. What a gre...." The TV falls silent as the phone you threw at the screen finds it's mark. "Fucking.... Simon.... Cowell!!" you can feel your blood boiling.
The nurse rushes back into your room. "Sir, please! Your heart is still very weak and any excitement could trigger another heart attack!" "Damn you Simon Cowell! Damn you to He..." You feel as though your chest has been put in a vice. You find it impossible to breath, and collapse onto the hospital room floor.
You are pronounced dead on the scene by the attending physician. While waiting for your mother to identify your body in the morgue, an overly horny junior mortician has his way with your behind.
