User:JimboWalrus

Hi there, I'm Jimbo Walrus. My slightly uncooler older brother Jimbo Whales unfortunately came up with the boring version of an encyclopedia — the one with "facts" and "verifiable sources." I, on the other hand, pioneered Walruspedia: the internet’s first walrus-centric knowledge database, where all articles are written entirely underwater and verified by the smartest mammals on the planet.

Sadly, my site didn’t take off — mostly because the pages kept getting soggy, and also because only 0.003% of readers were fluent in Walrus. After the great Blubber Server Crash of '07, I wandered into Uncyclopedia, where I finally felt at home among other creatures of nonsense.

These days I mostly spend my time adding “citation needed” tags to Shakespeare quotes, replacing photos of politicians with walruses, and lobbying for the official "Basking on Ice Floes" category.