User:Frinko/Sam the Snowman

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Sam being a self-rightious snob to his viewers.

“I'm sorry, it all just seems so trivial right now. I mean we're still in Afganistan, this country's under siege, ya know? We're getting warnings every week, and what are we talking about here? An abominable snow monster? Ooooh! A snow monster, I'm sooo scared! Lets all worry about some crappy-ass snow monster! Come on folks, you watch CNN. I'm holding 3 months of cipro up by butt-hole, and you want me to pick up a friggin banjo and- screw it! I can't do this.”

~ Sam the Snowman on Narrating the "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" Christmas special after 9/11

“My left nut's more famouse than Jerry Stiller”

~ Sam the Snowman on Jerry Stiller

“HEY! WHAT THE F**K?!”

~ Sam the Snowman on Santa Claus

“Santa, I just don't think it's appropriate.”

~ Sam the Snowman on Narrating the "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" Christmas special after 9/11

“It's not about you, douchebag!”

~ Santa Claus on Sam the Snowman

“Telling the story of Rudolph is just what you should be doing. You're an entertainer, it's a simple job, okay? Do a dance, show us your boobs, and make us happy, monkey!”

~ Santa Claus on Sam the Snowman

Sampson "Sam the Snowman" O'Frost

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