User:Free Colony

All Praise and Glory Be Theirs!

This user has been promoted to the rank of Queen's Reader.
Due to their site-topping talents in reading, all other chores formerly assigned to them have been rescinded. Unlike other ranks, this one is for life, and they will not be returning to their former tasks anytime soon. If you were hoping they would reply to a message, sorry to disappoint, but such a menial task is currently outside their job description.

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NOT SAFE FOR BRAIN The article you are looking at may not be brain safe! If your mind or personality notice this article, claim that it was spam and blame a virus. Otherwise, continue to read it until you spork out your own frontal lobes.

Thi$ arti¢£€ ₩a$ ₩ritt€n b¥ a ¢apita£i$t.

You may read it for free during a 2 hour trial period.
Afterwards, it will crash unless you give us your credit card number.
Save money! Sign up now for only $49.99!!!
(first three months)

“In the Free World, I own the template!!”

Relax...... This article is certified safe for prudes. It is so tame, you could walk right up and poke it in the eye and it wouldn't fight back. The MPAA couldn't give it more than a PG rating, and even China has no desire to censor it. So just sit your family down in front of the computer, and bask in the warmth of its gentle humour.

A КоммциiзT was written by this article☭ "In Soviet Яussia, template adds УФU!!" Note that both the 中国人 and ze Яussians love ziz AЯTICLE!

This article may not be suitable for all audiences. This article contains content not suitable for people with the brain of a person under 14 inches (35.5cm) tall or TransVestites.

The information contained in this article can cause emotional damage to women, children, ocelots, and metrosexuals.

If you are one of them, please see this article's page just for you.

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ATTENTION: Residents of areas affected by Free Colony are advised to seek advice and information from local authorities through television and radio, and official weather forecast web sites (links below). Information on an encyclopedia may not be current or applicable to your area.

Do not decide whether to leave your house, shelter or vehicle based on Uncyclopedia information. In fact, do not decide to do anything in your life based on Uncyclopedia information. Except if we tell you to leave the area. Because staying in the path of a 120-mile-per-hour hurricane is beyond DUMB.

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Please mark adult content with a warning for young readers.

How else are they going to find it?

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THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS ONE OR MORE WORDS OR PHRASES KNOWN BY THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA TO CAUSE CANCER, BIRTH DEFECTS AND OTHER REPRODUCTIVE HARM.

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WTF

Part I

NOT SAFE FOR BRAIN The article you are looking at may not be brain safe! If your mind or personality notice this article, claim that it was spam and blame a virus. Otherwise, continue to read it until you spork out your own frontal lobes.