User:Flaming Ace/Lab
Shoggoth[edit | edit source]
“So cute!”
“Teke-li-li!”
Shoggoths are cute little animals created by the famous songwriter Howard Phillips Lovecraft on a lonely night. He got the idea when he saw his aunt eat the head of a man-shaped cookie.
Origins[edit | edit source]
According to the source of Evil, Shoggoths were created a long time ago in a far far [1] away galaxy by a bunch of winged star shaped headed creatures. It's bullshit of course. Everybody knows Shoggoths are an invention of HotPockets Lovecraft.
Description[edit | edit source]
A Shoggoth is usually described as a huge, oily, black creature. Yeah, just like Barry White.
Notable notes[edit | edit source]
- ↑ far
Edward The Head[edit | edit source]
“That poor guy: he's so skinny! Let's give him a job!”
“BRAAAAAAAAINS!”
Edward The Head (somewhere in time - somewhere else in time), AKA Edward The Body Ventura is the leader of the popular English football team Iron Maiden.
Life[edit | edit source]
Edward was born from the love relationship between a corpse and black magic, about whoknows years ago. When he was just a little crazy brain-eating-people-slaughtering monster he was adopted by the Iron Maiden (he's, from a legal point of view, Bruce Dickinson and Steve Harris' son), who eventually decided he would be their new manager. However, since Edward tended to chew the head of every music critic, including the ones that positively criticized the band, they decided he was perfect for stage guarding: today his job consists in making sure that no-one and nothing tries to hug, touch, high five, rape, take a picture of and say hello to one of his friends.
Appearance[edit | edit source]
Eddie's appearance varies from album to album, due to his love affair with fashion: sometimes he's dressed like a king, sometimes he likes to become a green alien that eats astronauts' brain.