User:DickDickinson/Nakatomi Plaza Heist

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1988 Nakatomi Plaza Heist
19881224camsecurityfootage.jpg
CCTV footage of Gruber and accomplices arriving at the Nakatomi Plaza, minutes before the attempted heist was set in motion.
LocationNakatomi Plaza (Today Fox Plaza), Los Angeles, California, United States
DateDecember 24-25, 1988; c. 8:00 p.m. - c. 12:00 a.m. (PDT)
Target$640 million (USD) in negotiable bearer bonds located in a secure vault within the Nakatomi Plaza
Attack Type
  • Robbery
  • Bitch Move
  • Cowardly Act Motivated by Greed
  • European Vanity
Deaths18, including the perpetrators
Non-Fatal Injuries8
PerpetratorsHans Gruber and 8 other accomplices

The 1988 Nakatomi Plaza heist, also known as the 1988 Los Angeles Christmas Eve Robbery or, more colloquially, The First Die Hard; was a failed heist and an event that happened for real which took place on christmas eve 1988 inside the Nakatomi Plaza in Los Angeles. On that day, at about 8:00 p.m. (PDT), a small band of highly skilled criminals, led by Hans Gruber, hijacked the whole Nakatomi Plaza and held about 30 hostages for a few hours, as they broke their way in a highly secure vault located within the plaza. Their plan was severely compromised almost right from the start and eventually made to fail by the actions of a single off-duty NYPD policeman named John McClane.

Events[edit | edit source]

In the evening of december 24 1988 at about 8:00 p.m. (PDT), a group of well-trained criminals that all looked like struggling keytarists, led by Hans Grubber, entered the the Nakatomi Plaza's sublevels with a big fucking 1980's Ford truck with Pacific Courrier markings. They reached the building's loading dock and waited as two of their accomplices shot down and killed the two 1980's security guards on 1980's duty in the 1980's lobby. One of them, Theodore "Theo" Gilyard, was brought on the team as an 1980's expert computer hacker and proceeded to block 1980's access to all of the 1980's elevators under the 30th floor, 1980's escalators (very important) and to the whole 1980's building in general, cutting themselves from the 1980's outside world. At this point, Edward "Eddie" Van Haylyn, a man with an 1980's haircut so beautiful he could never have been JUST a security guard in real life, took over the dead guard's duty to make it look like nothing happened in the eyes of the notoriously incompetent LAPD... but everyone knows that they didn't really have to kill the guard, they could have just put a fucking inflatable waving man in the front desk, had it existed in those days.

A few minutes after the whole building was put in lockdown, Gruber and a whole band of struggling 1980's pop-rock musicians armed with H&K MP5 sub-machine guns, who also happened to be criminals (as it was often the case in those days) reached the 30th floor using the elevators that were supposed to be locked and subdued the guests of a christmas party held in the Nakatomi Corporation's executive offices, taking them hostage and preventing some from doing cocaine or having drunken sex on their boss's desk. According to one of the surviving hostages, Gruber then held a brief bullshit speach about the "corporation's greed around the world", before setting out to find Joseph "Joe" Yoshinobu Takagi, president of Nakatomi Trading and vice chairman Nakatomi Investment Group, amongst the hostages. Takagi was then taken to his office and later found to have been executed due to his refusal or inability to provide Gruber's crew with the safe's electronic key.

Law enforcement response[edit | edit source]

A few minutes after Gruber's group took their hostages, an off-duty NYPD policeman named John McClane managed to escape undetected to the upper floors and trigger a fire alarm. However, the alarm was immediately called-off by Eddie Van Haylyn and declared a system error.

About half an hour later, McClane used a walkie-talkie that he obtained by "accidently" snapping the fucking neck of the worst-dressed one of the thugs (a two-piece matching light grey cotton tracksuit and Dwight Schrute glasses) to transmit a distress call on a frequency reserved for emergencies. Of course, the LAPD was pissed that someone would dare ask them for help, and even more so if they used non-standard procedures, but since gun shots were heard during the call, they were out of options and had to send a squad car. All of this was consistent with the LAPD's then-policy of refusing to intervene immediately in any situation that would require a certain amount of physical or mental effort, except of course if there existed the possibility of shooting or beating a young unarmed african-american for no valid reason.


“The decision that was taken, initially, not to intervene, was made in accordance with our policy, which dictates that no officer of the law shall be obligated to lift a single finger or break a single drop of sweat, provided, of course, that there shall be no evident and imminent opportunity for them to shoot or beat up black people, or other minorities. In that sense, I am confident that the police department acted with integrity, honor and discipline during the unfortunate events that unfolded last night the Nakatomi Plaza. ”

~ Daryl Gates, Chief of Police of the Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD) on december 25th, 1988


LAPD Sergent Al Powell was the officer who responded to the call and the first law enforcement officer to check the Nakatomi Plaza that evening. After taking a quick look around the lobby, Powell sensed that he did all the he could so he went back to his black and white only to have one of the terrorist's corpses shatter his fucking windshield after its fall from somewhere at the top of the building. Powell then calmly exited the plaza in reverse gear to safety, and politely and called for reinforcements in a composed way.

In the minutes that followed Powell's call, Deputy Chief of Police Dwayne T. Robinson arrived at the scene and took over the police operations in the area. His initital actions were to send a small SWAT team of 4 men to be shot and badly injured in an ill-advised attempt to break into the building. Satisfied with the moderate success of his first move, he decided to send a Cadillac Cage Commando and its crew of 3 get blown to pieces.