User:Death4151

Eland

Eland “which happens to be in WI” is not one of the wonders of the world once believed to be by the A- team. It’s a small town trying to gain its independence through the “Pokka god”. When we asked local citizens Bob and jEsSy how their god would deliver them, they replied, “ PLAY SOME SLAYER!” As every one already knows Slayer is a metal band formed in the 80’s which has nothing to do with Pokka. Anti Pokka’s say theirs still hop for Eland.

Alean and Eland

There have been rumors of mythical creature in eland. Local seers tell of a half metal man and half anime named Alean. Every year his name is praised for the many times Alean has saved the village from the local “flip flop” herds that’s have been trying to ram through the Pokka town. Every child now turning 3 has to take their most trusted weapon on the “worm hunt” to prove their worthiness to praise the Alean and bring honor to him.

Humble Beginnings

Eland was started in 732 AD by the vickings. Local legends tell of the heroic men and women who fell asleep while flying in their so-called “airplane”. They later crashed into what is now today as eland. All came off the plane all right but one kitten bruised its Pokka gland. After some time the bruise spread across its body. The cat was later pet and because of the fur the people didn’t know what great harm was being brought apon them says unlocal scientist. By touching the contaminated cat the once harmless buries became a disease far worse than the world has ever seen since the color pink was invented. We asked local hippie for a comment on the topic but the only answer we were able to get was “purr purr”.

Pokka Shield

The earliest know record of eland is a fuzzy photograph from an airplane flying over. Later the government hushed the people by telling them they took a picture of a hot air balloon. Then finally in 1962 a Russian government tried to take 423 pictures of the site, but all appeared fuzzy except one which showed Arnold Swartsenager attempting to eat a “nutty hoagie”.In 1973 a team of scientist and lab monkeys set out to observe this site. They all came back with new Pokka action figures and a slight taste of Pokka. Though the exploration was successful. We learned that the Pokka town has been radiating micro Pokka waves, which shielded the town from radar, etc. The government later incorporated this new fined with their stealth planes. By playing this Pokka a pilot could only be seen by eyes. The only draw back was that if too much Pokka was played the crews head would explode from and overexposure of the music. We believe it’s because of our weak amune system that we can’t endure large amounts of this music. Then in 1992 the US Government finally felt that the general public was mentally stable enough to learn of this horrid place.

Eland and you

Eland Wisconsin is the largest exporter of fake mustaches. Every mustache you receive out of you cereal box has been specially made to fit you curtsy of the Pokka god and his people. The reason they want us to wear these contraptions is because they radiate Pokka Chemicals, which has been proven to cause addictions to the common man. Scientists have been testing ways to prevent these addictions through many painful lab experiments. One successful experiment enveloped metal heads have extreme levels of Pokka blasted at them. All but one fell pray to the Pokka Additions. It was later discovered that the one was Emo, and was meant to be a prink by the CEO of the project. Reaschers theorize that the long greasy hair of metal heads causes the Pokka waves to bounce of the subject. It was also discovered that Anime fans don’t care about any thing but anime and because of this the fans paid no attention to the waves. Its been said to better understand the Pokka people that the creature Alean should be questioned and experimented on.

Eland and Wisconsion

It has been calculated that the fake mustache market is bringing an average of 30,000 dollars per sec to the Wisconsin economy. For this reason WI won’t let eland become its own nation. With this finational stability it is likely to become the next super power. To counter this Mohammed, Greenland, and the state of Maine is trying to find a way to impose great taxes on WI but so far all attempts have failed.