Uncyclopedia talk:Beginner's Guide/Formatting
In 410 A.D., during the reign of Patchy the Supreme Emperor, the West Roman City of Shall Not Pass was attacked by a mob of crappy spears group of fierce warriors from the tribe of the Thuringians. Some 4300 hairy stinky peasants warriors amassed from two different armies coming from the east barbarian city of Octodurun to try and sack the most fearsome bastion of defense in the West Roman Empire. The defending forces under the command of another hard as crap name to pronounce Anatolius Pullus were comprised of 2255 other less hairy and less stinky men roman legionaries and auxiliaries fought the opposing forces inside the town for the 187th defense in the last few years.
The city disposition was one more problem faced by the garrison. The one day to be IMPLODED by Patchy coliseum in the town center afforded once again easy acess to the grease weasel barbarian forces, leaving the defending garrison with a hard time in placing archers and legionaries in a position of strenght and not shotting friendles in the back line of sight cenario.
As soon as the enemies came inside the city a barrage of arrows and plumbata darts followed decimating the enemy forces, however the barbarian axe wielding units managed to break the barricades in the right side of the coliseum and engage the legio comitatenses who were there. At the same time in the left flank roman spear units were holding their ground against the horde of filthy barbarians enemies while the roman archers fired away.
In a masterfull, brilliant, beautiful move by the Equites units, the roman cavalry, from the same spot they camp every battle out of nowhere, delivered a fast charge against the back of the axe units in the right flank, who were overwhelming the defenses, saving that flank from total annihilation. The cavalry units followed up this movement by doing the same thing in the center of the battle and after much swearing by Patchy much struggle routed those units too.
In a mirror move, the legio units in the left flank managed to exploit their knowledge of the city streets and found themselves in a position behind the enemy lines, where after throwing all their plumbata darts and darkening the sky, charged foward killing one of the enemy generals and causing the forces who remained to pick up their skirts and run screaming flee.
At this time the second Thuringian army was approaching the city howling curses against the roman forces, but in a desperate move the enemy general and his group attacked the left flank head on and was promptly welcomed by a massive volley of fire arrows followed by a charge of legionaries decending from the town center. The second enemy general, germanic noble entourage, was unable to retreat and after a tough fight was finaly vanquished.
Shortly after the demise of the second barbarian general all the remaining roman forces converged on the center fight and complety surrounded the enemy stupid AI blob tatical formation of cheap AI spears, OMG AI warriors causing a beautiful chain rout to ensue and finaly winning the battle decisively.
It was a Heroic Victory for the legendary LEGENDARY, yes i mentioned only ONE time, we all know its LEGENDARY Patchy West Roman Empire. It is rumored that emperor Patchy visited shortly after to congratulate his troops on the defense of Emperor Patchy Summer House the city and gave away gold and glory to his valiant soldiers.