UnScripts:Battle for Dream Island

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Battle for Dream Island is part of

The UnScripts Project

Your personal Shakspearian folio of humor, love, woe and other silly emotions

Battle for Dream Island is a fun web animation show. Here's the scripts of note, of funny things that happen in the series. All of the characters are, funnily enough, inanimate objects.

The First Episode[edit]

MATCH: Yeah, I know, she was so surprised!

PENCIL: Really?

MATCH: Oh, for sure! I mean, it wasn't very big, just a little bug, but Flower went crazy!

PENCIL: OMG, Flower is really afraid of bugs!

MATCH: Well yeah, Flower thinks she's so fabulous! [Editor's Note: It's true.]

{Zooms in on Match}

MATCH: Like the time she asked Icy if she was beautiful...

{Flashback to Flower and Ice Cube.}

FLOWER: Ice Cube, don't you think I look beautiful?

ICE CUBE: Uhh, no...?

{Flower gets angry and kicks Ice Cube. Flashback ends.}

ICE CUBE: [cut the piffle, Icy. NO! DON'T CALL ME ICY!]

BUBBLE: Uh, yeah?

MATCH AND PENCIL: No! Ice Cube! Stop!

{Bubble pops and gets recovered in the Bubble Recovery Center. Pin's top goes close to her from the right, then goes back.}

BUBBLE: Pin, you nearly popped me!

PIN: Oh, it's not my fault. It's this stupid Blocky here. It's his fault! {kicks Blocky so he flies through the air}

BLOCKY: UGH. {hits the ground and gets up} Fine, I'll get Needle. {throws Needle at Bubble}

NEEDLE: {flying} Help!

BUBBLE: {ducks and dodges} Yikes! What was that for?

BLOCKY: Hey, I'm just in the mood to hurt someone.

{Woody whimpers and screams in terror, and Blocky kicks him.}

WOODY: (screams) {lands in ground near Teardrop}

LEAFY: {picks Woody up} Woody, get up! There's a life out there to enjoy, so, enjoy it!

{Woody moves towards Teardrop with love hearts, and Teardrop kicks him away.}

TENNIS BALL: Teardrop, calm down. Kicking Woody could severely injure him. {close up on his mouth} He is... 37% balsa.

{Woody passes Snowball who is hang gliding, and then hits Rocky. A chip falls off him and he screams in pain. Eraser and Pen are overhearing this, and they cringe}

ERASER: I can't believe what a scaredy cat Woody is. He's so uncool. Pen though, you're cool.

PEN: So are you, Eraser.

SNOWBALL: {hits mountain while gliding} Oof! {walks down mountain} Woah! Rocky! Wake up! {shakes Rocky}

ROCKY: Wha? Hi SB!

{Snowball sighs and throws Rocky.}

ROCKY: Whee! Oof! {hits Tennis Ball} Hi TB, my good ol' friend.

{Spongy is squishing up and down.}

FIREY: Coiny! You're so dumb!

{Coiny slaps him.}


COINY: Oh my gosh, Firey! You're so easy to slap! {slaps Firey numerous times}

GOLF BALL: Firey! Coiny! Stop fighting! And Spongy, take a bath, you're stinky.

SPONGY: Sorrrrry.

BLOCKY: Isn't Golf Ball bossy?

ERASER: I know. She's like a bossy bot.

{Blocky, Pen and Snowball stare at Eraser.}

ERASER: Uhh, you know, a bossy robot?

{Blocky, Pen and Snowball stare at Eraser again.}

ERASER: Well, a robot that was built to be its bossiest! I'd do anything to get away from her. Or Flower {cut to a white screen with Golf Ball and Flower} or Woody {Woody shows up}, or Spongy! {Spongy shows up and knocks the other contestants away. Cut back to Goiky.}

ANNOUNCER: {falls from sky and knocks over Eraser} Well, then you're in luck.

ERASER: Uhhh, how?

ANNOUNCER: Well, everybody, they're building the island of luxury. It's called Dream Island. A whole square mile of paradise, a five star hotel, a casino, six restaurants, robot servants, {images for each are shown} and the winner even gets to decide who gets to come and who doesn't.

{Firey, Blocky and Bubble are shown running through and Woody slams into a metal door}

ERASER: So, umm, how much will it cost?

ANNOUNCER: Not even a penny (or 'cent' for the imperialists among us).

ERASER: Then I'll take it!

ANNOUNCER: But what about everybody else? They want it too, you know.

ERASER: Uhh, I wouldn't give up that island for anything.

ANNOUNCER: Neither would they. So we must settle this with a contest.

{Intro plays}

ANNOUNCER: So, yes. Whoever stays on the bar the longest wins. {Contestants are released from tubes onto the bar}

LEAFY: Let's help each other.

PIN: Yeah!

{Blocky has his legs going up his face.}

COINY: Blocky! Wake up! What are you doing?

SPONGY: {falls off the bar} Uh-oh. FLOWER: Out of my way! {pushes Woody, Eraser, and Tennis Ball off the bar} I need my space! {pushes Firey, Golf Ball, Needle and Leafy off the bar}

LEAFY: Help me Pin!

{Pin catches and saves Leafy with a "Snatch!" sound effect}

LEAFY: Thanks.

BUBBLE: Let's form an alliance!

MATCH: That could do no harm!

PENCIL: Let's do it!

ICE CUBE: What? An alliance? I've got to join. Coming through! {slides towards the alliance, knocking Pen off the bar} Sorry Pen! Hey guys, can I be part of- {slams Pencil, Match, Bubble, Snowball and herself off the bar}


COINY: Blocky! Come on, wake up! {shakes Blocky and he falls} Oops! {Blocky grabs onto the beam and swings around, knocking Coiny off the bar}

BLOCKY: Coiny, don't ever... Oops!

{Final 6: Flower, Leafy, Pin, Blocky, Teardrop and Rocky}

VOICE: Yeah!

LEAFY: There's the evil Flower! She's still in.

PIN: Let's run her over!

LEAFY: Yeah!

BLOCKY: Uh oh!

{Pin and Leafy run toward Flower, who kicks them off.}

PIN: Hey! We're flying!

{Eraser can be seen for a split second}

LEAFY: You're right! Woo-hoo!

PIN: Uh oh!

{They hit Teardrop, and they all fall. Teardrop and Pin grab Leafy, who grabs on to the beam}

PIN: Pull up!

LEAFY: I... can't! Oh no! Blocky? Rocky? Help!

BLOCKY: {walks to Leafy and steps on her} What is it?

LEAFY: You're stepping on me!

BLOCKY: {moves his foot off of Leafy's hand} Better?

LEAFY: Yes. Now pull us up!

{Blocky struggles to pull them up, but falls, and grabs onto the beam with his feet.}

LEAFY: Teardrop! Hold on to my other arm!

FLOWER: Ha ha! I'm wearing non-slip shoes so ha! {Blocky kicks her, and she falls} Hey! Grrr... {grabs onto Pin}

PIN: Ahh! {sticks her tongue out at Flower, trying to lick her}

FLOWER: Wha? Eww! Oh my god! Uhhh... uhhh... Ahh! {falls}

LEAFY: Nice going, Pin. A job well done.

PIN: Teardrop! Let's swing!

LEAFY: Ughh!

{Teardrop and Pin swing up to the beam.}

PIN: Yay!

LEAFY: Pin, alliance, remember?

PIN: Oh yeah! {brings Leafy up, and Leafy lands on Blocky's foot}

BLOCKY: Leafy! You're stepping on me! {falls}

[This segment halfway through Episode 1, brought to you by Blocky's Ferret Dimes International. Ooh.]

LEAFY: Wha...? Oops.

{Final 4: Pin, Rocky, Teardrop and Leafy. Teardrop starts running toward Rocky to push him off and he falls, but Teardrop falls too.}

{Final 2: Pin and Leafy}

VOICE: Yeah!

LEAFY AND PIN: Rock, paper, scissors. {Leafy picks Paper and Pin picks Scissors}

PIN: Scissors beats paper. I get to push you off.

LEAFY: Wait, hold on a sec! We didn't agree to that!

PIN: Look, when I win the island, I'll let you on to the island.

LEAFY: Pin! This still isn't fair!

PIN: Only one of us can win.

LEAFY: Ouch.

PIN: Whoops! He he... Anyway! Still, only one of us can win.

ANNOUNCER: That's where you're wrong. The two of you both win.

PIN: Wait, we both get the island?

ANNOUNCER: Nope! You just get to choose the teams. The teams for a much larger, longer battle to win Dream Island.

PIN: Oh great!

LEAFY: It's not that bad...

Cake at Stake, Episode 2[edit]

ANNOUNCER: Guess what Pin! (Pin happily rushes over to Announcer) You've won a Win Token.

PIN: What's a Win Token?

ANNOUNCER: As you remember, you were the only one to break the ribbon, that means you did better than the rest of the contestants. So you get a Win Token. If you're about to be eliminated you can use a Win Token to avoid half of your votes. And here is your Win Token. (Pin catches Token)

ANNOUNCER: Now it is time for Cake at Stake!

THEME: Dadadadadadada CAKE AT STAKE!!!

ANNOUNCER: But first we have to get *talks super-fast* Match & Tennis Ball & Golf Ball & Teardrop & Needle & Spongy & Rocky & Firey & Woody & Flower. If you don't remember what I said, just think of it in slow motion.

Cake at Stake Episode 2 votes: Flower 4, Golf Ball 1, Tennis Ball 1

In Episode 3, Cake at Stake is done, with key lime pie. (That's not cake!) Votes: Pen 1, Blocky 2, Spongy 4

Episode 4 Intro[edit]

  • Video This video has been removed...actually, APRIL FOOLS 2010!
  • (Cue Intro)

Episode 5 Cake at Stake[edit]

Announcer: Gloop gloop doot doot! It's time for Cake at Stake for the Cherries.

THEME: Dadadadadada CAKE AT STAKE!!!!

Announcer: There are eight of you now. There will be only seven later.

(Number of votes are shown on screen)

ANNOUNCER: Okay. So we got 14 votes. Well, I wanted to make an Ice Cream cake, but I forgot the ice cream. So I made a chunk of ice again.

Pencil: No!

(faints, gets recovered in the Pencil Recovery Centre.)

Pin: OMPF! Over reacting!

Announcer: JK! I have an ice cream cake. If you get no cake, you will leave BF Dream Island. Pin you have a Win Token. Would you like to use it now?

Pin: Um no. I mean there's nothing mean that I-

Announcer: Yeah Yeah we know! Bubble is at zero votes. AGAIN!

(Tosses cake)

(Needle falls and pops Bubble and destroys her cake)

Match: Ew gross! A needle!

Pencil: OMG! You don't like her? I love Needy!

(Needle slaps Pencil)

Match: Don't slap me, I said NEEDLE!

Announcer: Now, I will say who else has 0 votes. Pen, Pencil, and Firey.

(Tosses cakes to them)

(Pen catches his Cake)

(Pencil's cake splats on her back)

Pencil: Hey! No fair!

Oh yeah I forgot.

Firey: Hey where's my cake!

Announcer (Aims tosser at a house and tosses it)


(Cake crashes on the window of the house)

FIREY:Grr! I'm gonna crush you Announcer Speaker Thing!

ANNOUNCER: Needy ,What are you doing here? You're on the other team.

NEEDLE: Aw seriously!

(A Spring springs her out of Cake at Stake)

ANNOUNCER: You four all got at least 1 vote. Match and Eraser, You both got one vote a pei- I mean you both got one vote each.

DAVID: I don't appear till episode 15.

MATCH: Thank you!

(Match catches cake)

(Eraser eats cake)

(Final Two!!) (Pin and Woody)


(Woody sighs of relief)

ANNOUNCER: ...is eliminated at 9 votes.

(Woody starts freaking out)

ANNOUNCER: Sorry Woody. You didn't not ain't not get any none of nothing. Lets fling him to the TLC.

PEN: Wait, you always say the TLC. Is it an object?

ANNOUNCER: You mean the Tiny Loser Chamber? Duh! Of course it's an object.

(Sender Scoop Thrower flings Woody to TLC)

FLOWER: Uh oh! It's closing!

BLOCKY: Aw! Why do we get only five minutes of sunlight a day?

FLOWER: Move over Blocky!

ANNOUNCER: The fifth contest is to cross a bridge. The team with more people who crossed wins. The first person who crosses the bridge wins a Win Token. And go!

Episode 7[edit]

Announcer: It's time for Cake at Stake for the team that lost last time; even though they were in first place for a while, Coiny's team came at last. So let's go, Coiny, Icy, and Needy.

<Needle slaps Announcer so hard that it ends up at the Cake at Stake area>

Announcer: We got 18 votes, a record high. So yea, I've got two half of a cake. One of you will not get one. If you don't, you're eliminated. Needle, you have a Win Token, would you like to use it now?

Needle: Yeah!

Announcer: Ok. Where is it? There we go. Ok then. So Ice Cube, you are at the lowest with 1 vote. LOSMMORPG voted for you. He was the only one. The oddball in a group of normal voters. There is only one cake half left, but there are two people.

Coiny: Ak-ward-sil-ence.

Announcer: You know what Coiny?, you haven't spoken once in my Cake at Stakes. You were just contributing to the silence.

Coiny: Hey, look here. I'm contributing. Instead of spending time what you want to do, I'm helping out, and contributing to something else, the sound of silence!

Announcer: Ok so...

Coiny: Shh! We have to contribute to the silence.

Announcer: Coiny, you got...

Coiny: Shh!

Announcer: The per...

Coiny: Shh!

Announcer: Out of the final...

Coiny: Shh!

Announcer: Grr, Needy!

<Needle slaps coiny>

Announcer: Now that Coiny is gone, I can talk. Coiny is at 5 votes and Needy...

<Needle slaps Announcer>

Announcer: ...is at 12 votes. Because she used her Win Token, she's down to 6 votes, but thats still the highest, so Needle is out.

Needle: Aww Seriously?

Announcer: That proves that the number 13 is unlucky because Needle slapped exactly 13 times before she learned she was eliminated.

Episode 8[edit]


Blocky: Hi weirdos! Here's another prank! But this one involves Ice Cube instead of Bubble. Just take an Ice Cube Recovery Center and like just carry it over to the edge of a cliff, maybe with a tree, yeah yeah, with tree, definitely, yeah, that's mandatory. And attach a spring from the tree to the Ice Cube Recovery Center and, melt, Ice Cube.

[Blocky whispers to someone]

Blocky: Melting her kills her right?

Voice: Yeah.

Blocky: Ice Cube is recreated in the Ice Cube Recovery Center. She'll like weigh it down and, Ice Cube Recovery Center will tilt down off the cliff and, Ice Cube will fall out and then she'll crash in the bottom of the, cliff. And Ice Cube is recreated in the Ice Cube Recovery Center. She'll like weigh it down and, Ice Cube Recovery Center will tilt down off the cliff. Cycle repeats! Yeah, isn't that cool? Pretty funny?

Voice: This program was brought to you by Blocky's Funny Doings International. (BFDI = same as the show's abbreviation)

Episode 9[edit]

Pencil: Wow, this book is the best! [hears construction noises] Okay, what are those sounds? [rushes over to Match] Match! Do you know what those sounds are?

Match: What sounds? [hears a shatter] Oh, that?

Pencil: Yeah. Come on, Match, let's find out!

Match: Awww!

Pencil: [runs to the I.C.R.C.] Hey! That's the I.C.R.C.!

Match: What?

Pencil: Uh, you know, the Ice Cube Recovery Center, the place where Ice Cube is created when she dies?

Match: Wow, Koolieo.

Pencil: What's going on?

Match: Come take a look.

Pencil: Cool! It's Ice Cube, and she's shrinking!

Match: No, she's falling. [Icy shatters, gets recovered and knocks down Pencil and Match]

() ()

Announcer: Name-choosing time. Leafy, Icy, TD, SB, and Blocky, choose your name.

Leafy: You know, I've been a Squashy Grape for so long, I think we should continue to be the Squashy Grapes! Sounds good?

Snowball: Uh... Yeah!

Announcer: Then that's your team name. Okay, moving on. Rocky, TB, GB, Coiny, and Firey, what's your name?

Firey: Ooh, ooh! I wanna be the Squashy Grapes, too!

Golf Ball: No, NO! The others are already the Squashy Grapes! Our name has to be another name!

Announcer: So then your team is Another Name.

Golf Ball: Wait, I--

Announcer: Let's go through our current teams. Squishy Cherries, Squashy Grapes, and Another Name.

Episode 10 Advertisement[edit]

Yellow Face: Need some money fast and soon? Then buy our Box of Paper Slips!! At first it might just seem like a blank slip of paper, but just scribble a number on it, and POOF! It's a dollar bill! This person managed to buy a TV. This person bought a house! This person bought the world! So yeah, BUY NOW!

Of course, in real life, this would bring down the economy. But this is a YouTube animation series, so nobody cares.

Episode 11 - GB and TB's Argument[edit]

Golf Ball: What do you think that cloud looks like?

Tennis Ball: I think the cloud looks like a tennis ball.

Golf Ball: Well, I think it looks like a golf ball!

Tennis Ball: Tennis ball!

Golf Ball: Golf ball!

Tennis Ball: Tennis ball!

Golf Ball: Golf ball!

Episode 12[edit]

VOTES: Pen 71, Eraser 61, Blocky 50, Ice Cube 40, Leafy 37, Pencil 36, Fiery and Match tied 34, Snowball 32, Bubble 31

Announcer: I'll get to that later. So anyway, I'm give you all 30 bonus points

Leafy: But this game doesn't even have points!

Announcer: Well, now it does! Win tokens are now obsolete, and can be traded in for 15 points each. Also the Cake at Stake intro changes.

Episode 13[edit]

(first birthday of BFDI cutscene)

Episode 15[edit]

David got 39 votes for elimination, even though he isn't a character yet.