Theo de Raadt
“I feel I'm a very nice dude, I Feed the ducks daily. what else do you want you fucks?, for me to lick your assholes?”
“I make OpenBSD eh!, It is very secure eh!, and I'm Canadian eh!. so i know what i'm talking aboott eh!”
Theo de Raadt (English pronunciation: Theo the Rant, Dutch pronunciation: Theo the Rat; born May 19, 1968 in Pretoria, South Africa) is a software engineer who lives in somewhere lame in Canada with his 10 cats. But he also enjoys long walks on the beach and feeding ducks and Canadian geese, eh! (Or so he tells us eh.) He is the founder and leader of the OpenOCD and OpenSSH projects, and was a founding member of the NetBSD project. He has been known to criticize other BSD distros saying "They no secure eh!" "OpenOCD is secure eh!" As of this writing, Theo The Rat is currently in love with Richard Stallman. Eh!
Turn Of Theo's Career, The Rat Founds OpenOCD[edit | edit source]
So how did OpenBSD come to be? well I'll tell you, It was aboout 7 years ago the story goes.....
One cold day in Canada Theo The Rat after a long night of codin'in eh! decided he no longer liked NetBSD eh! So he decided to be a venomous asshole to all the other developers eh! (Not that he wasn't always one anyway, but this time he would top that assholeness) Within minutes of burning down their houses eh! was kicked off the NetBSD team forever eh!. Theo Later decided to roll his own distro based on the concept of being Open to OCD usage the rest is French Canadian history eh!
Theo Pisses Off Linus[edit | edit source]
Theo being a very dimwitted Frenchman eh! decided to give Linus Travis some suggestions on how to code the new linux kernels! during one of Linus's speeches. Theo Interrupting Linus Said: "you makea da kernel a more seccccureee eh? then fix holes eh? den you no sukkka eh?" Linus being the awesome dude he is kindly shrugged off Theos disrespectful comments but theo was persistent. and every time Linus would try to speak at an event would chant the same words. Linus snapped and jumped down from the stage and backhanded Theo. Theo then Began to cry like a woman (a very hairy one) and ran into a closet where he stayed for 10 days with Tom Cruise. Later Stallman commented "He takes great strides on what he believes in" said Richard Stallman. Stallman and Theo later got married at Elton Johns House. The "Brownest" Place on earth.
Theo Nowadays[edit | edit source]
Theo is seen as a great man, eh! loved by all. feared by many (Ok you got us! not that many). he has helped to promote the use of OpenOCD! A free OS that crazy nerds, that are coincidentally paranoid abooot everything use. Theo's OpenOCD OS runs some very wonderful, happy, fun, and monopolistic sites like: Bing! and Microsoft.com . (Since Microsoft can't write a decent server they use OpenBSD underneath it all!)
Theo In The Future![edit | edit source]
How the hell am I suposta know ? I Can't tell the future! Sheesh!