Talk:William Shakespear
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From Pee Review[edit source]
Contrast with William Shakespeare --~ 
Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.
16:19, 6 April 2007 (UTC)
| Humour: | 5 | A good start, but could be improved in a number of ways. First you have some good, original moments - such as Oscar Wild, the fraud having sex with Shakespeare's wife, his role as curtain-raiser, and being dipped in water until he confessed. More of these kinds of jokes would be helpful. Second, try to keep the non-humour narrative briefer; for example, in the paragraph with the curtain-raiser joke, you spend several lines explaining the situation before getting to a joke. Third, it would be great if you could add a list of parody plays - more "McBeth"s - though you would have to be careful to be different than the Shakespeare article. If you could add an explanation as to how each play parodied one of Shakespeare's that would help. |
| Concept: | 8 | This is a good idea, and has a lot of potential to be really funny. |
| Prose and formatting: | 7 | Properly formatted. Carriage is misspelt. |
| Images: | 4 | The one photo is a pretty good impersonation of Shakespeare. More photos, maybe related to some of the plays, would help. |
| Miscellaneous: | 6 | A decent at a rewrite that could go further. If you really wanted to go all out, it could read like a Shakespearian tragedy, with Shakespear bringing about his own downfall due to his impersonations. He might even kill himself after Shakespeare dies, to impersonate his death. |
| Final Score: | 30 | I see you've even written the Ron Popeil play. Are you planning on doing a whole series? |
| Reviewer: | Rogpyvbc 04:01, 30 April 2007 (UTC) | |
Yeah, I'll probably end up writing a majority of his plays. I'm trying to apply the ideas you gave me. Hopefully it will turn out good. Thanks! --~
Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.
00:33, 2 May 2007 (UTC)