Rainforest Cafe
Rainforest Cafe is a chain of themed restaurants mostly located inside of shopping malls across North America. The current brand was founded in 2005, after the original owner, Cha Cha, was arrested for 5 counts of treason and 1 count of drug trafficking.
Founding[edit | edit source]
The Яаiиfoяеst Кafe Коmmциist Кlцв was founded in 1955 by George W. Bush, then known as Jorge B. Aliyev, and Cha Cha (the frog mascot), then known as Kha Kha, in Astana, Kazakh SFSR. The RKKK was a very well respected gang on the streets of Kazakhstan, and eventually they caught the eye of Nikita Khrushchev. Khrushchev sent them to the USA as a spy operation, and had them learn how to serve American cuisine. The first location opened in the Mall of America, a small local shopping mall in a suburb somewhere in Noville. However, the business began to become a little too profitable, and Jorge and Cha-Cha forgot their core value of communism. So they started to capitalize on the Rainforest Cafe brand, eventually opening 6 locations in shopping malls around North America.
The Fall[edit | edit source]
In 2001, Jorge became president after winning the 2001 Presidential Elections, and as a result, forgot all about his original purpose as a soviet agent. Since Jorge was too busy doing other things, he left the Яаiиfoяеst Кafe Коmmциist Кlцв. Cha Cha couldn't manage the whole operation by himself, and quality started deteriorating inside the restaurants. Customers reported dry and stale food, and their beloved Safari Fries just didn't taste the same anymore. In 2004, Cha Cha was arrested and sentenced to life in prison for smuggling 60 pounds of methamphetamine across the US-Canada border. This move by the US government was challenged by Jean Chretien, who argued that it was more trade for the US and Canada.
Now[edit | edit source]
All of the original Rainforest Cafe locations no longer exist, and all the former locations are occupied by a seperate company that also coincidentally has the name Rainforest Cafe. Cha Cha, the original founder of the RKKK, is not serving burgers anymore, instead serving 10 consecutive life sentences.