Mikes
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“Fine! Fine! I'll write an article on Mikes!”
“Mike's not really a bad name.”
“No, Mike's a stupid name.”
Okay, John Uncyclopedia has decided to force me to write an article on Mikes. I'm not sure why it had to be me though, I feel like it would have made more sense to get someone named mike to do it, but (Get on with it, you tickǃ -J.U.) Fineǃ God, I don't even to complain around here. I hate it. (Well too bad, it's your fault you wanted to write stuff on here. -J.U.)
What in the... something, i don't know are Mikes?[edit | edit source]
Well, Mikes are anyone or anything named Mike. Like, a pet rock or my roommate or something like that. Mikes are also short for Microphones, for... some reason. Mike can be used for a lot of things, i guess. Mike is also short for Michael, and I'm not sure if that's short for anything. Maybe Michaelangelo or Michaelsoft.
Interview with a Mike[edit | edit source]
Someone mailed this to me recently, it was a VHS of all things labelled "Log Peepants", and you know what it was? A Mike interview. Here's what it said right here:
Interviewer: is your name Mike
Mike: yes
And that was literally the entire thing. A pretty stupid thing to mail to someone. (Can't argue with that. -J.U) Whoever mailed that to me, you're an idiot.
Famous People named Mike[edit | edit source]
Immediate Clarification for the really stupid people, Famous People did not name Mike. Anyway, famous people named Mike include (We've already done a page on this, you silly sausage. -J.U.) Oh. Um...
Okay, future Not Mike, put a sub-part containing people not on the Mike Page.
Famous people named Mike not on the Uncyclopedia Mike List[edit | edit source]
These include Mike from Mike & Ike, Mike from Thomas & Friends, My roommate Mike, Mikerosoft, Mike (who could've written this page), Mike (who couldn't have written this page), Possibly the guy in the image up there, Mike from FNAF At Fredrick's, Michaelsoft Binbows, Mikerophone, The Original Mike, The guy in the other image over there, Mike Palin, etc.
History of Mikes[edit | edit source]
History of Mikes? I don't know any history of Mikes! (*cocks gun*- J.U.) Okay, okay! Umm… the first Mike was born around the 1th century, to Ms. Parent to Original Mike and Mr. Parent to Original Mike (i was too lazy to find out their names) (It shows. -J.U.). The naming process went as follows. Ms. Parent to Original Mike said "We should do something new, since there's only like, 32 names in existence." Mr Parent to Original Mike then said, "So like the thought process of whoever came up with John, the Interdimensional Manager?" Ms- this is taking to long to type, I'm just gonna start saying Ms. and Mr. PTOM. So Ms. PTOM said, "How about Like, but one letter off?" And whooperteedoo, this resulted in the first usage of Mike. Their neighbor, Mr. Coffee (namesake of the machine from Spaceballs) after hearing about their kid being named Mike, decided "hey that's a pretty good name", and decided to name his future kid that. And you know what, he did. His daughter Lilly thought it was a stupid name though, as shown in the quote up there. Eventually, after 5 more centuries and many more Mikes, a couple Matthews, a few Brians, and no Gregs, A Mike would actually become kinda famous, that Mike being, President Mike Spaghetitis (namesake of Spaghetitis Disease) of... um... what was he president of again? um... Oh, found out! Mike Spaghetitis was the 3rd president of the Planet Earth Go-Karting Society. I'm not gonna lie, Earth is a really stupid planet, and I'm saying that as a resident of it. Anyway, after that, a lot more people found out about the name Mike, such as the famous Paul (help, the text ran away). Evenchuallyee, in the Now, Mike is still a pretty good name. Except in Lilly Coffee's opinion.