Larry (cat)

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Larry I
King of the Fucking United Kingdom HEY WHAT DID I SAY
Larry Chief Mouser.jpg
Reign 2010 - present
Born January 2007
London UK
Predecessor King Sybil

Larry is a cat who has served as King of the United Kingdom at 10 Downing Street since 2010. He is a brown-and-white Tabby, believed to have been born in January 2007. By July 2016, when Theresa May became prime minister, he had developed a reputation of being "violent" in his interactions with other local mousers, especially with Duke of Winsdor Palmerston[1]

Early life[edit | edit source]

Larry is a rescued stray cat from the Battersea Dogs and Cats Home who was chosen by Downing Street staff. Larry was intended to be a pet for the children of David and Samantha Cameron, and was described by Downing Street sources as a "good ratter" and as having "a high chase-drive and hunting instinct". In 2012, Battersea Dogs and Cats Home revealed that Larry's popularity had resulted in a surge of 15% more people adopting cats.

Career[edit | edit source]

Official duties[edit | edit source]

The Downing Street website describes Larry's duties as "greeting guests to the house, inspecting security defences, and testing antique furniture for napping quality". It says he is "contemplating a solution to the mouse occupancy of the house" and has told Downing Street that such a solution is still in the "tactical planning stage".

Larry outside Ten Downing Street

Unlike his predecessors since 1929, Larry's upkeep is funded by the staff of 10 Downing Street. Fund-raising events to pay for his food are believed to have included a quiz night for Downing Street staff held in the state rooms.

Work as King of the UK[edit | edit source]

He made his first known kill – a mouse – on 22 April 2011. On 28 August 2012, Larry made his first public killing, dropping his prey on the lawn in front of Number 10. In October 2013, Larry caught four mice in two weeks and one staff member rescued a mouse from his clutches.[2]

In July 2015, George Osborne and Cabinet Office Minister Matt Hancock cornered a mouse in the Chancellor of the Exchequer's office, trapping it in a brown paper sandwich bag. The press joked that the Chancellor of the Exchequer might take over the Chief Mouser position. Freya (cat) is the queen

David Cameron explained during his final Prime Minister's Questions in 2016 that Larry is a civil servant and not personal property, so would not leave Downing Street after a change of premier. Larry has retained his position with the Boris Johnson administration.

References[edit | edit source]

  1. Much Younger than Palmerston
  2. Catches for mice in one week