Inferiority complex

Ummm look, very sorry to disturb your day with this article, i know you could do it much better, but my psychologist reckons that i should cure my inferiority complex by trying to write more articles for sites like this one. He says that a lot of desperate people find some small measure of joy writing here, even if the whole practice is ultimately futile, as indeed is all of life and especially all of my life. i don't really think it's worth it myself, especially as my psychologist kept laughing and laughing as he told me to do this.

i mean it's not as if my inferiority complex is very good in the first place, more of an inferiority simple really, which is a very inferior form of inferiority complex and much much smaller and less noticeable, like me. ... anyway i suppose i ought to explain what it is i suffer from, even though you will obviously know much more about it than me, and you won't find any of it interesting.

Definition

An inferiority complex, to some, is a beautiful little flower that needs to be nurtured, watered and fed with fluffy tidbits of cat food so that it eventually grows into full blown Patriotism and leads to a sturdy career in the military where finally, I can get some RESPECT from you groveling LITTLE BASTARDS!, but for most of us it's just the bugging feeling that one is a worthless piece of shit.

It is often unconscious, though how anyone could know that is beyond me. I suppose there might have been some kind of questionnare or something:

'How pointless am I? Please check on option:

1. I am a useful member of society
2. I am a member. That's as far as it goes.
3. On the surface, I feel fine, but in my unconscious mind, I am a puppy lost in a snow storm and chased by wolves.
4. Fuck you and your fucking questionnare, Pal. Go an pick on someone else.

Inferiority complexes are thought to drive afflicted individuals to overcompensate, resulting in excessive time spent wearing bigger hats, wikipedia editing other peoples vastly more intelligent contributions, collecting hedgehogs into small piles and grappling with a furious desire to invade other countries and steal all their oil. Unlike a normal feeling of inferiority, which can act as an incentive for eating more beans, an inferiority complex is an advanced state of discouragement which often results from watching too much daytime television. For case studies, see any New Zealander.

But in the end, why bother?

The best thing about an inferiority complex is that you can push it deep down into your stomach and leave it to grow into a massive pit of hatred and then you can use this force wisely, Luke, to go out and throw rocks at hippies. From here, it's a simple step to buying a fleet of tanks and taking over your town - which given the fact that it is your town, is likely to be very small.

Once you've done this, the newspapers are bound to sit up and take notice. So start a cult and get on TV. Maybe wear some sneakers. because all the cool people wear sneakers. Now you can use your mind ray machine to get into their minds and then you'll be able to take over the world!!!

Hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah!

Notes