Day

A horny toad enjoys a marvelous day._{...only likes you as a friend.}

Day. Beautiful, sunny, warm, charming -

_{No, it fucking isn't. It's overcast, the weather is gloomy, and you have a fucking class to attend in an hour.}

- alight with birds chirping on the trees. The branches of the same are lush with fruits, and the bushes around them are dazzling with flowers. The sunshine -

_{Bullshit. You're in your dorm. You were masturbating all night and now you have overslept. You have to run to class now without brushing. You filthy animal.}

- bathes my shoulders as I take a gentle dip in the calm lake -

_{More like a thirty-second shower.}

- ah! Refreshes the mind and body and soul.

_{Too bad they don't refresh your miserable grades.}

The fish tickle my feet.

_{Seriously dude?}

A Poem About Day: Awakening Earth

Look yonder as the dawn freshens,

_{It's nearly noon you wanker.}

As the early birds take flight,

_{You're still in your smelly bed in your smelly underwear.}

Look upon the sky as the day awakens,

_{Look up to the cracks in the ceiling,}

Watch your stupid football posters peeling. Fucker.

And the vales are awash with light.

_{Get a life man.}

Why I Like The Day

Jimmy wants to play!..._{Not really. Jimmy died three years ago. You never fed him.}

It's so beautiful! A great time to go out and play, or just bask in the sun,

_{You'll do that when you actually get off your computer. And, I told you it is fucking gloomy outside.}

or perhaps enjoy a game of football with friends.

_{You don't have any friends.}

It is sad that people underestimate the gaiety of daytime, and spend it on the Internet instead. Wouldn't you rather play with your dog in the pool, than browse Wikipedia?

_{And might I remind you of the websites you usually visit?}

I was looking for cats.

_{On pornhub?}

A Quiet Afternoon

_Lol.

The sun charms the earth with its warmth this afternoon. The insects are droopy, the strays are sleeping.Everything is quiet and lazy. After consuming a basket of fruits --

_{Chips cannot be classified as fruits.}

-- I'm resting in a cool shade of a tree --

_{First you come late to class, second you sleep. Third, you don't see the prof standing beside you.}

--without a worry in the world.

_{...You spoke to soon.}

OW! What the--oh fuck.

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I Had A Bad Day

I was in detention, the prof is an asshole, I'm hungry and tired and fucking pissed with the world. Don't you fuck with me. I'll crack your ass into seven pieces and feed them to hellhounds.

_{"The fish tickle my feet."}

Fuck you.

_{Finally, you're speaking my language}