Curry bread
Curry buns, also known as curry bread (カレーパン, karē pan in JapanLand) are a popular greasy pastry with a moderately difficult-to-pinpoint origin country as history books are utter nonsense written by liars and scam artists. Stuffed with piping hot curry and baked inside a crispy bread bun, curry buns are the best thing to burn your mouth on (after Pizza Rolls).
History[edit | edit source]
When a bunch of British guys arrived in Japan (for the sake of implementing the coal mining industry there) they brought along curry with them. The picky Japanese population couldn't however stomach the new imported dish - at least as long as it wasn't seasoned with ketchup and bonito flakes. As the Japanese began implementing their own unique cooking ideas into the dish they began experimenting with other local ingredients, such as potatoes (known as jagaimo, resulting in "jagaimo karē"), local giant killer wasps (known as ōsuzumebachi, resulting in "ōsuzumebachi karē") and curry sauce (known as karē sōsu, resulting in "karē sōsu karē"). Curry eventually became an uniquely esoteric Japanese dish, and a considerably more difficult one to pronounce than their cheap western imitations.
The Japanese population loved this new curry they had invented completely from the ground-up by themselves. They often served the dish with uniquely Japanese rice and were truly proud of their new-found invention; however the satiation in their newly reformed culinary culture didn't last for long, as the American colonialists came over (for the sake of stealing the British coal mining industry for themselves), bringing along with them bread. This neither went down very well with the Japanese population, at least until a guerrilla freedom fighter in Osaka shoved an American soldier carrying a loaf into a hot curry pot (a popular execution method at the time, known as the "piggu karē"). The resulting soupy mixture of human flesh and grease, authentic Japanese curry and the soldier's bread influenced the locals to develop the idea further, resulting in the cooking method known today as deep-frying.
The Osaka locals began stuffing the deep-fried bread puns with the curry and the dish became quickly famous in the region. However, the exclusivity ended when the British re-invaded the country to fight for the rights of their curry and their coal mining industry secrets, taking the curry buns with them and bringing them to a wider awareness. Curry buns became in fact so famous that a global war was started for the exclusive production rights of the dish, involving the countries of Britain, Germany, India and a small family business operating in northern Canada. The Osaka residents however won the dispute after sending official Nintendo-stamped cease and desist letters to each of the participants, and so have since the global curry bun wars faded to tales of yore.