User:Mattsnow/I'm so much better than you

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ATTENTION SCUM.
You are the lowest form of life on Earth. You are not even human fucking beings. You are nothing but unorganized grab-asstic pieces of amphibian shit! Because I am hard, you will not like me. But the more you hate me, the more you will learn. I am hard but I am fair. Here you are all equally worthless.

Me

There you are, you little piece of worthless shit! You will read this article like the no good, almost illiterate loser that you are, you are going to get insulted and you know what is making me grin slightly? You will love me for it. Indeed, it doesn't interest me one bit if your stupid ass deems this piece funny or not, for I am God almighty. I am IT. I'm not only a big deal, I am a huge freaking king, and to compare you to me would be like comparing cow shit to a golden statue.

I am tough, but I am fair (I think)[edit | edit source]

And that is just how you cesspool of stupid fucktards seemingly like it, since you always need directions from someone superior to you in order to function in your miserable little lives. I am the neighbor that hates your stinking guts so much that I will attack you with a steel shovel when you least expect it, leaving you with a face that looks like it's just been in a meat grinder! I am your boss at that fucking pathetic job of yours that keeps belittling you and call you an asshole because you just can't accomplish the simplest of tasks even a baboon could get away with. I am the guy that completely demolishes your face for so much as having a glance at his girlfriend. I am that awesome dude you always knew you could never be!

You on the other hand[edit | edit source]

You

You look every bit the scroungy little fuck people unanimously agree you are. You are so disgusting I don't know why I am resisting the urge to unscrew your head off and piss down your severed neck! I bet your parents regretted their whole lives not to have used protection that damn disgusting night where a goddamn fish-like piece of trash made its way into a rotten egg in your mom's dirty vagina! You reek of shit so much you make actual shit smell like perfume, and I'm being nice here!

I saw a rat the other day at the dump and I'm sure he had more potential than your skinny, filthy little carcass will ever have. You make me want to gut you alive and puke inside your guts as revenge for all the ugliness you are bringing to this world! Darwinism and natural selection don't even begin to describe why you should be neutered, and your balls thrown off to the middle of the Sun. If you continue to stare at me in that stupid fashion that is yours, I'm going to gouge out your damn eyeballs and skullfuck you!

On the whole[edit | edit source]

I don't know if you've noticed, but I do not like you, I am not fond of you, I could not give two shits what you think about me, and you can go do everybody a favor and remove yourself from this Earth. A shotgun blast to the skull would just be too nice and swift, I suggest chugging a few liters of battery acid. Your death will then be slow and very painful, just as you deserve. Your demise will be forgotten instantaneously, if not celebrated.