UnNews:Pieces of 'Scott' fired into space
30 April 2007
UPHAM, NEW MEXICO The remains of 'Scott' from last week when he jumped on a mine were sent to space with a blast on Saturday. About 360 mph, these pieces had crashed into satellites including Xapolo 5E, the satellite with the coolest name in the orbit of Earth. Some of the pieces had succeeded time travel and crashed into satellites from the future, but that info is yet unknown.
Scott had flown onto a mine last week on 27 April when he found out that he will have another chance because he sucks so bad. God and Jesus had reported that he "so gets that second chance! He does! He does!"
Scott's mother, Scottless Skin, had said that she "never wanted to has a baby". Scottless came to America during the World War Z when people came from Kansas to a little left Kansas. About 7912 people died during the World War Z, as it was lead by Adolf Z and Coach Z
His mother had said, after his death, "Yes, well, shoosting remains to space was quite expensive and I was saving money for it. If I didn't, I would of bought a house, car or get rid of smoking, drinking and such. I knew he was going to step on the mine. I put it there. I knew it before I put it there". Those words sent mom straight to Jail for 2 months, because Scott was such a bastard.
The people that whitnessed Scott's death say that Scott's last words were "Aughiyagu hugyatu yugituijyu!!". They do not know if it was caused by the explosion or the fact that Scott is extremely insane.
- Dissassembled Press "Pieces of 'Scott' shoosted into space. People happier alots." CNN, April 28, 2007
- Some Kansas neighbourhood "Scott sent to heaven, what the hell? He was such a bastard." Kansas Daily, April 29, 2007