As we said, we are so extremely sorry that no one has been bothered to write an apology page but we can do no more than offer out greatest and most sincere expression of regret on the fact that we have no page about apologies. We are also sorry that we couldn't even think of anything funny to put here, but instead filled this page with a half-funny and un-original idea. We would also like to take this opportunity to offer our sincerest regret for all the damage and harm that Uncyclopedia has caused. It has been very, very bad and it knows it. From now on Uncyclopedia will not attempt humour ever again.
We are so, so sorry.
To The Children
We would like to offer a big, fat
lie "sorry" to the children concerning the following matters:
- Global Warming, actually...hell, no! You should be grateful for this you little snot-covered pieces of dirt! Now your puny holidays are warm and nice.
- The Internet, we're sorry that you get to share the porn, now.
- That your parents conceived you.
- Family values.
Nazis No, I'm pretty sure Nazis is meant to be in there... Nazi
- Flavourless flavoured condoms.
- This sorry excuse for a page.
- This sorry excuse for a list.
Sorry For The Sorry-Ness Of This Page
We're sorry for the sorry-ness of this page, the amount we've said "sorry" already and the annoying fact that we've dodged saying "apology". We're sorry that we put a gay box thingie, we're sorry that we ever made your or even, allowed you to cast your eyes upon this sorry puddle of a heap of words. We're sorry for insulting vulnerable groups of society and for preying on the weakness of others. We're sorry for laughing at your excuse for a god and we're sorry for saying sorry about things you never really cared about...