User:Keitei/old: Difference between revisions
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imported>Keitei m (I LOVE MHAILLE) |
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| − | |width="55%" rowspan="1" valign="top" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c9c9c9; color: #000; background-color: #f3fff3"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"> <h3>The Story of the Keitei</h3><br /> |
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| − | In the beginning, there was no Keitei. She did not grace the lands of [[Uncyclopedia]] for three full months. Emptiness and sadness spread throughout, even if nobody noticed.<br/> |
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| − | One day, there was a great disturbance in the force as a Keitei sprang from the earth. But it was not the Keitei we know. 7 out of 8 [[Oscar Wilde]]s agree: she sucked. There was no funny and there was no majick.<br/> |
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| − | As fate would have it, she would go on to idle for months, humming in the background like that frigging disk drive. What she was doing during this time, [[nobody cares|nobody knows]]. Maybe she was becoming [[Midget_cockpunching_terrorists|cool]], or maybe she was just being lazy. But all of Uncyc was to grimace in horror the day she appeared from the depths to spam votes left and right.<br/> |
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| − | Feeling that she wasn't cool enough, the Keitei ventured into the hellhole that is IRC. Thus began an [[Bovine Intervention|amazing transformation]] during which the Keitei reached a state in which she was no longer stupid and unfunny, but stupid and unfunny with ADMIN POWARS. |
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| + | YAAAAWEEE! |
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| − | ---- |
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| + | | |
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| − | <h3>Moral of this Story</h3> |
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| − | <center>I pwnz you.<br/><br/> |
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| − | That is all.</center> |
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| − | <br/> |
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| − | ---- |
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| − | <h3>Teh Keitei</h3> |
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| − | [[Image:Hurricane_Keitei.jpg|thumb|Hurricane Keitei sweeps through Uncyc, leaving bannination and despair.]] |
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| − | <br/> |
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| − | <code>Is that "she" as in "40-year-old male pervert", or "20-something male FBI agent"?</code> |
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| − | :-'''[[User:BobBobBob|Bob<sup>3</sup>]]''' |
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| − | <code>The primary reason I admined you is because you wrote your name in all caps and two exclaimation points.</code> |
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| − | :-'''[[User:Chronarion|Chron]]''' |
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| − | <code>You are so cruel to the things you love.</code> |
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| − | :-'''[[User:Volte|Volte]]''' |
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| − | <code>Keitei, you are the most admin-esque admin of all time.</code> |
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| − | :-'''[[User:Tompkins|Adamface]]''' |
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| − | |||
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| − | ---- |
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| − | <h3>Trivia</h3> |
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| − | ; I use a Mac. : You should, too. |
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| − | ; My browser is Opera. : But admittedly just for IRC. |
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| − | ; I kill people who hit on me. : Are we understand? |
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| − | ; I love everybody equally. : But I love [[User:Dawg|Dawg]] and [[User:Splaka|Splaka]] more. |
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| − | ; I have an unabashed, patriotic love for Uncyclopedia. : Wikipedia just doesn't have the same pizazz. |
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| − | ; I'm a touch lazy when it comes to articles. : It's best to expect them never to be finished. |
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| − | ; Hitler is inherently funny. : So is leukemia. |
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| − | ; I switch identities every now and then. : [[User:Keitei/Past Identities|Things I Have Been]]. |
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| − | <br/> http://qntm.org/files/board/0.png<br/> |
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| − | ---- |
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| − | <h3>Things to get my lazy butt around to doing</h3> |
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| − | *Finish [[Cereal]] |
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| − | *<s>Expand [[Nobody cares]]</s> |
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| − | *Finish [[Vomit]]ing |
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| − | *Do [[Agnus_Diaboli|something]] with the [[User:Keitei/Lambs|lambs]] |
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| − | *[[DESTROY ALL HUMANS]] |
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| − | *Écris the [[Franglais]] |
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| − | *Use [[:Image:Heart-o-nails.jpg|this]] |
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| − | *[[Hi:|Celebrate!]] |
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| − | </div> |
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| − | |width="45%" class="MainPageBG" valign="top" style="border: 1px solid #c6c9ff; color: #000; background-color: #f0f0ff"| |
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| − | <div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"> |
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| − | <h3>What You Should Know</h3> |
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| − | There are two rules here: |
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| − | #Be funny and [[HTBFANJS|not just stupid]]. |
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| − | #Don't be a dick. |
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| − | <br/> |
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| − | I enjoy FREAKZORZING OUTZORZ. However, I am a reasonable admin and will listen to you. I'd prefer if you came to [[Uncyclopedia:Chat|IRC]] though. I'm there always, and if by any chance I'm engaging in [[Sleep|humon activity]], there are plenty of admins or wannabe admins who can help you.<br/><br/> |
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| − | NRV is something that puts off many a noob. May I stress that although we ''are'' saying your article sucks, we are not saying it will always suck. |
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| − | #It may very well just be too short. |
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| − | #Perhaps it needs formatting and wikilinks added. |
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| − | #Maybe the language isn't that enthralling. |
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| − | #The idea might suck, but the title doesn't. Try a new approach. |
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| − | Don't give up! NRV is a second chance. Use it! |
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| − | ---- |
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| − | <h3>Vandalism Is Bad</h3> |
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| − | OMG VABNALS |
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| − | ; Blanking pages : Removing content from a page and either: a) leaving it blank, or b) putting one or two lines which often have to do with [[gay|homosexuality]] or perceived "owning." |
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| − | ; Vanity : Articles or additions which are about someone who is [[Uncyclopedia:Vanity Policies|non-notable]]. Usually this is the author or someone the author knows. |
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| − | ; Slandanity : Vanity with slander. Example: Someone-nobody-has-heard-about is so gay!! |
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| − | ; Spam : There are three types: |
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| − | :''Commercial.'' |
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| − | ::These are external links to actual spam sites which will be put on the spam blacklist. |
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| − | :''Vanity.'' |
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| − | ::Linking your page on every article you go to. |
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| − | :''Other.'' |
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| − | ::Putting unnecessary templates on a bajillion pages. |
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| − | ---- |
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| − | <h3>Your Ban and You: Understanding Each Other</h3> |
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| − | If you do get banned, try to understand why. Did you vandalize? Did you violate policy? Were you being a dick in an unfunny manner? There is most likely a good reason why you were banned, and even why that ban length was chosen.<br/> |
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| − | If after some [[think|self-actualization]] you think the ban was unwarranted, ask the admin who issued it. You may email them or visit [[Uncyclopedia:Chat|IRC]]. If you are reasonable and civilized, you may even be unbanned. |
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| − | ---- |
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| − | <h3>Adopted Idiots</h3> |
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| − | What can I say?! I like noobs. They tend to grow on me. Some who have endeared themselves to me: |
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| − | :[[User:Whywhywhy|Whywhy]] |
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| − | :[[User:Anidnmeno|Anidn]] |
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| − | :[[User:Tompkins|Adamface]] |
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| − | :[[User:Lugiatm|Loogie]] |
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| − | :[[User:Singaporekid|Skiddles]] |
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| − | :[[User:Zombiebaron|Zombiebaron]] |
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| − | :[[User:Mandaliet|Mandypoo]] |
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| − | :[[User:Hinoa4|Hinoa]] |
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| − | :[[User:DaBlade|DaBladester]] |
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; Graduated Idiots |
; Graduated Idiots |
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