Neuro-linguistic programming: Difference between revisions
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| − | [[Image:uglygrinder.jpg|thumb|Joseph Goebbels]] |
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| − | {{Q|I shall conquer the world|Oscar Wilde|}} |
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| − | {{Q|I shall reframe the world|Oscar Wilde|}} |
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| − | {{Q|Heil|Oscar Wilde|}} |
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| − | '''Nazi Lewd Propaganda''' is a tool first introduced by [[Goebbels|Joseph Goebbels]] to spread the [[Hitler|Nazi]] doctrine and [[AIDS|AIDS]] by using [[Hypnosis|hypnosis]] and advanced [[Brianwashing|brainwashing technology]]. |
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| − | == The History of NLP == |
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| − | After the fall of the [[Germany|German]] Third Reich in 1965, survivors of the Nuremberg Trials designed a plan to resuscitate the fundamental Nazi ideologies by strategically adapting to the new environment and studying the conflicts of the present [[World|world]]. |
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| − | The ideas are usually presented under the guise of innocent-looking crappy self-help books, their titles being a subliminal message to awaken the Nazi spirit in [[You|you]]. |
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| − | In 1973, german National Socialist Party member Richard Bandler, a relative of Richard Wagner, earned worldwide attention after publishing one of his first propaganda books entitled ''Time for a Change''. |
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| − | Richard Bandler's popularity encountered great difficulties as he used NLP to murder Corine Christensen, a presumable spy of the French Communist Party who had uncovered the whole NLP ideology. |
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| − | In order to maintain the good public image of NLP, Bandler's ex-boyfriend John Grinder, a clone of Josef Goebbels, banished him from the NLP community renamed the Plan as "Neuro-Linguistic Programming". |
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| − | The inevitable consequence of the NLP outburst will finally culminate in a new totalitarian Nazi regime in the whole [[World|world]]. |
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| − | == NLP Today == |
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| − | Today, NLP is also used as a mainstream prayer and preparation manual for muslims who want to reframe their body substance into combustible. |
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| − | [[Psychologist|Psychologists]] highly praise the value of NLP in tricking their clients with [[Low self-esteem|low self-esteem]]. |
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| − | Since many NLP authors claim scientific validity of their theories, NLP is also gaining popularity in the world of [[Scientology|Scientology]] and [[Dianetics|Dianetcs]] |
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| − | However, the Scientology conspiracy is another story... |
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| − | NLP is used in many branches, including the business world, the military, the underground and hospitals. This will further allow people to believe in the whole bullshit that will one day revive [[Hitler|Hitler]]. |
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| − | == NLP and Seduction == |
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| − | {{Q|I saw, I paced, I got laid|Oscar Wilde|}} |
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| − | Among the several phenomena related to the outburst of the NLP [[Conspiracy|conspiracy]] is the exponential rise of [[AIDS|AIDS]] among male population. |
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| − | A selection of NLP literature and courses has drawn the attention of horny loosers and [[Nerd|nerds]] by proposing them methods on how to finally get [[Sex|laid]] by sexy women. |
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| − | Unlike stated by the great scepticism, these methods often work, since one of the first steps in becoming a seducer is to redefine, or, in NLP terminology, [[Frame of mind|reframe]] the meaning of "sexy". |
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| − | Infact, in 30% of the cases, the women are as nerdy as them and they could have got them even without paying for seduction courses or books. The other 70% of seduced women are usually bitches or transvestites. |
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| − | Consequently, 91,3% of the succesfull males have been later diagnosed with STD, especially with AIDS. |
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| − | In some cases, even irreversible dementia, [[Schizophrenia|Schizophrenia]] and [[Nihilism|nihilism]] has occured. |
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| − | [[Goebbels|Joseph Goebbels]] hopes that the resulting death toll of loosers and nerds will facilitate the establishment of a new, pure, aryan race. |
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| − | == NLP Modeling == |
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| − | In an [[UN|international]] response countering the male monopolization of NLP, NLP has been used also by the female population in order to climb the ladder of fame in modeling agencies. |
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| − | Women in NLP Modeling manage to get married to important Sheikhs or businessmen and thereby evade the horny [[Nerd|nerds]] trying to seduce or rape them. |
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| − | NLP Models are nevertheless not recognized by [[Italy|Italian]] designers, such as Armani and Versace. |
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| − | == The Communist Reaction == |
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| − | [[Image:communistrobbins.jpg|thumb|The communist version of NLP]] |
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| − | Outraged by the success of the Nazi Lewd Propaganda plan, [[communist|communist]] dictator '''Tony Robbins''' decided to use his own method to brainwash powerful people and prepare for a major fight against the Nazis. |
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| − | Unlike NLP users like terrorists who torch themselves, Tony Robbins advices to walk ''on'' fire. |
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| − | Even [[Wikipedia|Wikipedia]] states that "Robbins has coached a number of world leaders, including several US Presidents, as well as Mikhail Gorbachev, Princess Diana and others. He has presented at the White House for both presidents George H. W. Bush and Bill Clinton" |
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| − | There are rumors about this communist considering to run for U.S. Presidential Elections in 2008. |
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| − | {{subcat|World domination}} |
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| − | {{subcat|Hitler}} |
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| − | {{subcat|Psychology}} |
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