User:Tonicbelly/Theory of Gallantivity

A common photo used to explain the Theory of Gallantivity to middle school children and primates

“Scientists have found the end of the universe and were shocked at what they found. No one could have predicted that at the end of this vast amount of empty space lied two men, one wielding a guitar and the other a set of drums, jamming out universal truths. When asked how they reached such a phenomenal distance they simply replied, 'We were steady rollin'”

~ Ethan Laser on the Theory of Gallantivity

“Seems like home to me...”

~ Two Gallants on living at the end of the universe

“Everyone seems to think that the song 'The Hand That Held Me Down' is about a woman, but in reality, we were very upset with gravity holding us down at the time and thats when we decided to get the hell outta there”

~ Adam Stephens on their music & departure from Earth

“Science!”

~ Albert Einstein on explaining the theory

Two Gallants on their way to the end of the universe

Origin

The theory was said to be brought forth by Sergei Rachmaninoff during the big bang, but was written in some form of russian music notation which has yet to be decrypted. There is much debate to whether he actually wrote the original theory because of his inability to operate pencils.

It wasn't until 1902 that Nikola Tesla put the theory to test. He buried 253 bean burritos in the ground then walked into the ocean never to be seen again.

Spotting Two Gallants from Earth

It is possible to see the Two Gallant formation in the sky from earth with the naked eye; but a monocle will make you look much more badass while standing around. To spot the Gallant formation in the sky, you must be outside anywhere between sunrise and sunset. Find the brightest object in the sky and stare at it for as long as you can. If you start to loose vision, it means you need to open your eyes wider.

A young child's first time seeing the Two Gallant formation