User:Callum996

Hi. I'm me, a slightly overweight, balding loser who loves WoW & Runescape. In case Peto-Dorito is here (runescape guy who PKed me) I HATE YOU YOU MOTHER OF A PIG-DOG BASTARD. To everyone else here, hello. I was born in the year of our Lord, 1675 (year of the slightly overweight hamster) in a small peasant village outside Nussex. My mother was a raging alcoholic and I would usually come home to find her blind drunk on cranberry juice. I never knew my father, mainly because he spent his entire life hiding in a small washing basket and only speaking once every third lunar friday. He only knew one word, onomatoepia, and it got rather boring listening to it non-stop for 24 hours. I had 56 siblings, although my mother was rather embarressed by this and kept 45 of them in a hessian sack, so they could be dispensed and used whenever neccassery. At the young age of 89 I decided to leave home to venture across the street, only to find it happened to be a small internet cafe. I soon left this cafe as I was badly hurt by one of the bran muffins and we had a falling out. I ventured down to the great city of lights, Brussels.