UnScripts:Enemy of the CIA

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Enemy of the CIA is part of

The UnScripts Project

Your personal Shakspearian folio of humor, love, woe and other silly emotions

A humble journalist returns home after a hard day's work, only to find a very, very scared-looking guy in there waiting for him.

Journalist
Hey! How did you get inside my house?!
Guy
I had to break in! I need to tell you something I've discovered! Something horrifying!
Journalist
Okay, pal but this better be good, or else I'm getting my shotgun.
Guy
An innocent man was implicated in a deadly Government conspiracy and was assassinated, right in front of my very eyes! Oh, the horror!
Journalist
An innocent man assassinated? Who the hell are you talking about?
Guy
You, dumbass. (shoots him with a silenced gun.)

Journalist makes a dramatic and shocked face and dies.

Guy
(speaking into some microphone we can only see just now.)
Target neutralized, sir.
Voice
Roger. Retrieve package containing extremely incriminating evidence, torch the place and exit.

The guy does as he's told. The next day, the news spreads of a "terrorist attack" that took place within an "innocent journalist's" house. As a consequence, the US Government's reliance on the CIA is boosted considerably, and the evil guy who was responsible for the innocent journalist's assassination continues to merrily abuse his office.

And THAT'S what really happens to an enemy of the CIA.